The Call
Moderators: KimberlyS, CathyAnn
-
Jessie
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1102
- Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 9:44 pm
- Location: Eastern Washington
- Contact:
The Call
I need some series advice and I am nervous reck about it. I have made contact with the local TG/CD group threw e-mail but am having trouble making the phone call to call the person who has given me there phone number. I am not sure what to do????
I would like to get more involved with the local community and mabe be able to go out some of the time here but still I am not hat to do and why I can not make the phone call.
Please some advice???
Jessie
I would like to get more involved with the local community and mabe be able to go out some of the time here but still I am not hat to do and why I can not make the phone call.
Please some advice???
Jessie
- CJ
- Miss Diamond Goddess
- Posts: 3562
- Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2003 11:12 pm
- Location: Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Hi all,
Jessie,
Just pick up the phone and call them. That's the only advice I can give you. Don't be afraid to tell the person on the other end that you're a nervous wreck about this. Chances are, he or she will know exactly how you feel and will do what he or she can to put you at ease.
It's a phone call. It demands of you nothing more than you be able to have a conversation. And I would think that the Empress of Chat would be good at something like that, no?
Take your courage in both hands and go for it. Good luck!
Love,
CJ
Jessie,
Just pick up the phone and call them. That's the only advice I can give you. Don't be afraid to tell the person on the other end that you're a nervous wreck about this. Chances are, he or she will know exactly how you feel and will do what he or she can to put you at ease.
It's a phone call. It demands of you nothing more than you be able to have a conversation. And I would think that the Empress of Chat would be good at something like that, no?
Take your courage in both hands and go for it. Good luck!
Love,
CJ

- Sally
- We Will Never Forget You - Rest in Peace
- Posts: 630
- Joined: Thu Feb 26, 2004 1:33 am
- Location: N.S.W. Australia
The call
Hi Jessie,
I’m sure you’ll get plenty of suggestions regarding this, but my take on it is for you to think of why you contacted the Support Group in the first place, and are those reasons still relevant, if they are, then pick up the phone and make that call, and when the person answers it all you have to do is introduce yourself and say you’d like to talk.
Always remember that those of us who are or have been participants in helping out in support groups have all been through what you’re going through right now. The person who answers the phone fully understands what you’re feeling and that person is volunteering their time to assist you and they have the knowledge and experience to help you, whether it be you just want to talk or you want to have a face to face meeting.
Generally they will sound you out so they can form an opinion of whether you’re genuine or something else. I think we all understand that being who we are there is a need to think of safety first, but that person will be able to make a quality judgment by just talking to you and working through your concerns, and it does happen that group members may on more than one occasion just talk on the telephone, and this can be for reasons of them making a decision about you or giving you time to become more comfortable with them. They know how you’re churning up inside and they’ll do everything to put you at ease.
Talk is a powerful thing and the best therapy we can ever have is to be able to talk in person with others who know exactly where we’re coming from. Even now, there’s nothing I like better than sitting around in a relaxed atmosphere with a few people and just tossing around things which are going through our heads, it’s worth thousands of dollars which someone may spend on a professional, believe me, and it’s for free, plus we get lots of laughs too which is worth more than gold.
It seems to me that you’re reaching out and you’ve taken that big important step of making contact. I know from past experience of myself and many others what you’re feeling. It’s the thought of the unknown and what lies ahead which can sometimes make us hesitant to pick up that phone, but remember, you made the first advance and for very good valid reasons, didn’t you. You reached out to them because of a need and now they’re extending their hand to you, all you have to do is reach out and take that hand and I’m sure they’ll open a world to you which you’ve longed for, for so long, it’ll change your life for the better because you’ll talk with people who know where every word you say is coming from. Remember, the people in these Support Groups are people who’ve been down the same road as you, me and all of us, and they understand better than anyone else who has studied books and have diplomas hanging on their office walls. Support Groups consist of people who donate their time to help others of the same ilk, but they can only make the offer, it’s up to you to now pick up that phone and walk out of the darkness into the sunshine. Go for it.
I wish you well and look forward to reading of your success.
Kind Regards,
Sally.
I’m sure you’ll get plenty of suggestions regarding this, but my take on it is for you to think of why you contacted the Support Group in the first place, and are those reasons still relevant, if they are, then pick up the phone and make that call, and when the person answers it all you have to do is introduce yourself and say you’d like to talk.
Always remember that those of us who are or have been participants in helping out in support groups have all been through what you’re going through right now. The person who answers the phone fully understands what you’re feeling and that person is volunteering their time to assist you and they have the knowledge and experience to help you, whether it be you just want to talk or you want to have a face to face meeting.
Generally they will sound you out so they can form an opinion of whether you’re genuine or something else. I think we all understand that being who we are there is a need to think of safety first, but that person will be able to make a quality judgment by just talking to you and working through your concerns, and it does happen that group members may on more than one occasion just talk on the telephone, and this can be for reasons of them making a decision about you or giving you time to become more comfortable with them. They know how you’re churning up inside and they’ll do everything to put you at ease.
Talk is a powerful thing and the best therapy we can ever have is to be able to talk in person with others who know exactly where we’re coming from. Even now, there’s nothing I like better than sitting around in a relaxed atmosphere with a few people and just tossing around things which are going through our heads, it’s worth thousands of dollars which someone may spend on a professional, believe me, and it’s for free, plus we get lots of laughs too which is worth more than gold.
It seems to me that you’re reaching out and you’ve taken that big important step of making contact. I know from past experience of myself and many others what you’re feeling. It’s the thought of the unknown and what lies ahead which can sometimes make us hesitant to pick up that phone, but remember, you made the first advance and for very good valid reasons, didn’t you. You reached out to them because of a need and now they’re extending their hand to you, all you have to do is reach out and take that hand and I’m sure they’ll open a world to you which you’ve longed for, for so long, it’ll change your life for the better because you’ll talk with people who know where every word you say is coming from. Remember, the people in these Support Groups are people who’ve been down the same road as you, me and all of us, and they understand better than anyone else who has studied books and have diplomas hanging on their office walls. Support Groups consist of people who donate their time to help others of the same ilk, but they can only make the offer, it’s up to you to now pick up that phone and walk out of the darkness into the sunshine. Go for it.
I wish you well and look forward to reading of your success.
Kind Regards,
Sally.
Watch nature, because it’s our greatest teacher, it moves and flows and moves on again. We can never be free until we disengage, so allow life to flow as you find it. The way it is, is the way it is.
- Virginia
- Goddess of the Universe
- Posts: 5543
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 4:06 pm
- Location: Strange Magic Hill
Hi Jessie,
I can't add much to what my sisters have all ready said. My one recommendation as it has come up not necessarily here but in general, the voice! Just use your normal speaking voice. Alot of CD'ers get concerned about how they sound and the voice does not match the presentation! Don't worry about that, just use your normal speaking voice and remember, the person you are talking to is as Sally said, voluntering to help their sisters, like you to become more comfortable with themselves, so like CJ said just pick up the phone and call, I can almost guarantee that one of your next posts will be what a great group of folks they are and how much you enjoyed yourself and are thankful for all the new friends you made!
You Go Girl!!!!
Virginia
I can't add much to what my sisters have all ready said. My one recommendation as it has come up not necessarily here but in general, the voice! Just use your normal speaking voice. Alot of CD'ers get concerned about how they sound and the voice does not match the presentation! Don't worry about that, just use your normal speaking voice and remember, the person you are talking to is as Sally said, voluntering to help their sisters, like you to become more comfortable with themselves, so like CJ said just pick up the phone and call, I can almost guarantee that one of your next posts will be what a great group of folks they are and how much you enjoyed yourself and are thankful for all the new friends you made!
You Go Girl!!!!
Virginia
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!
- Penni SO
- Miss Emerald Goddess
- Posts: 169
- Joined: Mon Sep 04, 2006 10:10 pm
- Location: Australia
Hi ya Jessie,
Trust yourself,do not be afraid to take the step in making that phone call.
Sometimes we as humans stop ourselves from reaching our goals in life ,out of fear.As your sisters have written the people involved in support groups are there to offer a helping hand,a place for you to be safe and a place for you to be truly you.They will do their best too make your first contact a warm welcome .
If you can,write a list or the reason as to why you needed to make the phone call,so if you feel your stumbling or your mind goes blank you have that little reminder of how you felt and why you needed their support.
Remember we all feel scared at sometime in our life...and sometimes we have to conquer that fear.
I'm most certainly thinking of you,be strong my friend and make that call.
Hugs Penni
Trust yourself,do not be afraid to take the step in making that phone call.
Sometimes we as humans stop ourselves from reaching our goals in life ,out of fear.As your sisters have written the people involved in support groups are there to offer a helping hand,a place for you to be safe and a place for you to be truly you.They will do their best too make your first contact a warm welcome .
If you can,write a list or the reason as to why you needed to make the phone call,so if you feel your stumbling or your mind goes blank you have that little reminder of how you felt and why you needed their support.
Remember we all feel scared at sometime in our life...and sometimes we have to conquer that fear.
I'm most certainly thinking of you,be strong my friend and make that call.
Hugs Penni
Supporting wife of Transexual partner
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Jessie
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1102
- Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 9:44 pm
- Location: Eastern Washington
- Contact:
Thank you Thank you Thank you all. I will take all your advice into mind when I make that call. The making a list idea is the one that I feel will help the most as I wont blabber on about none sense (like I sometimes do) I will let you all know how it goes when I make that call. Again thank you all for advice.
Jessie
Jessie
- DeeDee
- Miss Golden Goddess
- Posts: 591
- Joined: Sun Nov 21, 2004 4:45 pm
- Location: South Florida
- Contact:
Hi Jessie
Sorry I'm a bit late to this thread..busy, busy.
I'd just like to share my experience with the "call". Oh, I probably picked up the phone a dozen times with the phone number in front of me and didn't call. Finally said "girl...do it" Keep in mind the contact person has seen it all and in my case (major umms and blank brain) she put me at ease so quickly and we had a nice phone chat, with her leading. The idea of a list of questions is good, but they will fill you in on things. For me, it was the first time I talked with another CD, which meant I was saying I was also. My group requires an interview (security issues you know), so we set up a meeting at a diner for coffee, endrabbe. She told me that 75% of the people she talks to don't show up for that step, but actually that was easier than the first phone call. LOL...as Donna said...the first meeting is huge also, but they are there to help you, and mine went fine. Its something I was so glad I did and it starts with that phone call. Hope that helps a bit..go for it..we aint getting younger.
Good luck
DeeDee
Sorry I'm a bit late to this thread..busy, busy.
I'd just like to share my experience with the "call". Oh, I probably picked up the phone a dozen times with the phone number in front of me and didn't call. Finally said "girl...do it" Keep in mind the contact person has seen it all and in my case (major umms and blank brain) she put me at ease so quickly and we had a nice phone chat, with her leading. The idea of a list of questions is good, but they will fill you in on things. For me, it was the first time I talked with another CD, which meant I was saying I was also. My group requires an interview (security issues you know), so we set up a meeting at a diner for coffee, endrabbe. She told me that 75% of the people she talks to don't show up for that step, but actually that was easier than the first phone call. LOL...as Donna said...the first meeting is huge also, but they are there to help you, and mine went fine. Its something I was so glad I did and it starts with that phone call. Hope that helps a bit..go for it..we aint getting younger.
Good luck
DeeDee
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Jessie
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1102
- Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 9:44 pm
- Location: Eastern Washington
- Contact:
-
Jessie
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1102
- Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 9:44 pm
- Location: Eastern Washington
- Contact:
Well yesterday I made the call and I will meet with a member on monday I did this during the last night Chat having the support of the girls there was really helpful and made really easy. I will follow up with how the meeting goes on Monday.
Thank you all for all your suport and continued support.
Jessie
Thank you all for all your suport and continued support.
Jessie
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Jessie
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1102
- Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 9:44 pm
- Location: Eastern Washington
- Contact:
Well it went well they kind of interview was to kind of narrow out those people who are kind of looking to date us (you know what I mean). ANy way I am planning on going to a meeting next sunday. I am looking forward to that. I am so glad that I have had the support of those from this great forum has made me grow some today.
Jessie
Jessie
- Absaroka
- Miss Diamond Goddess
- Posts: 3344
- Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2005 8:30 am
I'm glad to hear that you are doing this Jess. Also glad the interview went well. Congratulations on doing something you must have wanted to do a lot which was very scary.
Please let us know how the meeting goes. I'd also be curious to hear more about the interview.
Absaroka
Please let us know how the meeting goes. I'd also be curious to hear more about the interview.
Absaroka
everything under the sun is in tune
but the sun is eclipsed by the moon
but the sun is eclipsed by the moon