A Dicken's of a time -- the best and the worst.

Curly(SO) · Post by **Curly(SO)** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 4:24 am

Julie,

I'm so happy for you that telling your daughter and her husband went so well!
So sorry to hear about your SO, not much I can say that will make you feel better, except that we are all here for you, and thinking of you.

Curly(SO).

CJ · Post by CJ » Tue Mar 16, 2004 7:07 am

Hi all,

Julie,

Congrats on taking the plunge! I think you'll be able to draw some strength for the road ahead from your daughter now that she knows a little bit more who you really are. Communication matters, always.

Like Curly, I find there's not much I can say that will help either you or your SO, except to let you know that you're both in our thoughts and in our hearts. Remember: don't ever hesitate to reach out when the light seems at its dimmest, even though doing so may go against your natural inclinations. I'm sure you'll always find an ear somewhere on this board.

Love,
CJ

Kyra · Post by **Kyra** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 8:13 am

Brave sweet Julie,
I can't imagine, (or yes, maybe I can) how much courage it took to open up to your daughter. I agree with CJ, you will find strength in her. And maybe some new found support in helping around the house. I have nothing but praises to shower you with. I'm so happy that you have done this.

But, a word of caution, dear...
Too many brandies will do awful things to your gait.

Hugs and congrats,
Kyra

Laura · Post by **Laura** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 10:15 am

Dear Julie,

I'm happy that you've found your daughter (and husband) so accepting. Maybe that relationship can help give you the strength to cope with your wife's situation. That must be very very tough for you deal with to see a loved one going through so much pain. I hope by some miracle her condition can be eased. If not, it's important to "keep your head above water" so to speak to be able to deal emotionally with the situation, so keep in touch and draw strength from the rest of us (me too!).

Hugs,

Laura

Alexandra · Post by **Alexandra** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 2:50 pm

As I posted elsewhere Julie, congrats on the postitive outcome on one matter and we all are hoping for the best on the other.

Beauty · Post by **Beauty** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 8:26 pm

Hi Julie,

I'm so sorry about your wife.

I'm happy the forum can give you the release you need temporarily to think about other things.

CJ won't care, but I think it's very important what she did for you. I am just as grateful for you, who got me out of a bad place. What CJ did was a beautiful thing. (you don't need to comment CJ, I already know you won't accept the kudos, especially while we all pray or feel for Julie)

I'm also very happy you told your daughter and she accepts you. That's awesome and great!

I wish you all the best. Thank you for sharing your feelings here.

Beauty

Toni Divine · Post by **Toni Divine** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 9:06 pm

Julie:

A little behind the rest, but you and your family are in my prayers as well. 'Nuff said.

Toni

Gaven McLaren · Post by **Gaven McLaren** » Thu Mar 18, 2004 4:03 am

I am sorry about your wife. Though very glad that your daughter is accepting. I hope that no matter what happens that you find strength in your faith what ever it may be and remember you have friends that will be here for you.

Blessed be

Bernice · Post by **Bernice** » Thu Mar 18, 2004 11:54 pm

For once I am almost speechless.

(Almost.

)

Life is so fragile. 15 months ago my wife, younger brother, and mother were all in good health. Today, my mother has limited recovery from a crippling stroke. My brother suffered a TBI while being mugged for his wallet, was in a coma two hours shy of a whole week, and his sociopathic ex-wife has alienated him from me, so I cannot help him. My wife has suddenly developed severe atrial flutter, and they will try cardioversion in a few days. She will be at extremely high risk for stroke for awhile, if cardioversion even works. She is terrified. Frankly, so am I.

But, none of my family suffers any pain. My wife and I have discussed euthanasia and advanced care directives at length, but there are no easy answers. She says she wants to receive heroic care, then she contradicts herself if there is tremendous pain and no hope for recovery.

I can't imagine your pain. I've had cluster headaches, burns, and a kidney stone, so I'm no stranger to pain, but I think it is easier to have the pain than to watch someone you love when they are in such pain.

Dr. Kevorkian may have been a grandstander, and perhaps should not have videoed his last assist, but I still think it is none of the (expletive desired, but not used) government's business about what has to be the most personal decision that can ever be made. I guess I am a die-hard Libertarian.

I wish I could advise you. I cannot. All I can do is tell you what you already know: that you have many friends here who support you, and wish the best for you and your wife, whatever that turns out to be.

A good friend claims: "Everything's alright in the end. If it's not alright, it is not the end. "

Let's hope he is right.

Hugs,

Bernice