My story? Long, but a good read :)

Every story begins somewhere, so tell us how you got started crossdressing. Only one (1) topic per member, please!

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Lorna
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My story? Long, but a good read :)

Post by Lorna »

Ever since I was about 4 or 5 years old I have always liked female items - they were always so soft and silky. I remember one time at age 6 going with my 2 sisters to spend the night at my grandmother's. My grandmother would often lend my sisters a couple of these old, full-length nightgowns to wear - they were white silk with flower patterns on the front. Now I of course always had my own little baseball-print pajamas packed in my suitcase.

I originally had slipped the nightgown over my clothes (my sisters and I were just goofing around) but when playtime was over I had to take it off and get into my own pajamas. I told Grandma that I wanted to wear the nightgown instead of my regular pajamas - and she let me!!! :shock: I doubt that she ever told my mother... :wink:

My father stopped by Grandmas later that night and the 3 of us were camped out on Grandma's living room floor. As soon as I saw my dad walk in, I quickly threw my blanket over my shoulders so he wouldn't see.

By the time I was 7 or 8 I developed a fascination with hosiery. Pantyhose commercials were all over the TV, Wonder Woman & Daisy Duke were the female icons, and all the little girls in my class wore tights from time to time. How I envied my female classmates! They were a soft & stretchy item and I thought it was unfair that they were for girls ONLY.

It was finally at age 10 when my family and I had moved into a larger house with more than one bathroom. We kept a hamper in the upstairs bathroom and I would often find a pair of my sister's tights or my mother's pantyhose in there. The first time I tried on a pair of Mom's pantyhose, I was in heaven. That soft, silky feel caressing my legs was unlike anything I had ever experienced. Needless to say I would spend many afternoons after school locking the bathroom door & putting on all the pantyhose, tights, and slips my little heart desired. Well, it eventually came to pass that my father thought I was masturbating in there. It was embarassing when we had "the talk" but it would have been 100x worse if he knew the truth! So I just went along with it.

I entered high school in 1986 - the dawn of the SPANDEX era!!! My sister was in college and I of course had a blast with all of her leggings & leotards. I was in spandex heaven. At this point in my life I had seen enough Donahue to have a basic knowledge of crossdressers. But at that time I didn't consider myself one.

Finally, by the early 90s my CDing with Sis's clothes had died down... that is until I went to a club in NYC with some friends! We had gone to the Limelight - there were drag queens and crossdressers all over! While I laughed aloud with my buddies, I was secretly intrigued and wished for the courage to go out in public dressed either in drag or as a regular CD. From this moment on I would periodically go to Victorias Secret & buy pantyhose for myself. I bought a wig from a costume shop. I would spend time in my bedroom just putting on the wig and the clothes. Clothes were not an issue at this point with 2 sisters and a mother with so many dresses & such they were no longer wearing.

Needless to say when I moved out I snuck a few things with me. ;)

I was a full-fledged closet CD from 1993 to 1998. During this time I had still not even attempted to use makeup and still had a goatee.

It was in 1998 that I was really pushed - the engagement between my fiancee and I came to an end. I was so hurt, angry, and disgusted with humanity as a whole that I knew that I had to do something to "shock and piss off the masses" with NO regret whatsoever!

I started going to goth clubs. Most of the guys were already walking around in makeup, skirts and fishnets, playing the adrogynous male role. I bagan to do the same. That Halloween I decided I wanted to dress as a goth girl - fully female. I had a BLAST that Halloween & the girls LOVED it! :P :P :P

Finally in early 1999 I discovered a drag bar in the city and decided to attempt going out fully dressed. It was there that I befriended a drag queen who was also a makeup artist. With the proper techniques and a few months of practice, the rest is history! ;)
Live it. Love it. OWN IT.
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Kyra
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Post by Kyra »

Wow, excellent read.
I sometimes wish to go to NYC just to go to some of the clubs there. We've got our own element down in the French Quarter, but It's pretty tame compared to what I hear of New York.
Your story reminded me so much of my own beginnings. I always considered myself a freak. (You know how society is: You're either normal or a freak. No grey area.) It took a lot of years to overcome that image.

Well, I gotta go, talk atcha later. And be proud of who you are.
Hugs,
Kyra
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return. - Leonardo DaVinci
Beauty
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Post by Beauty »

Finally!! :) :lol:

Now I know the Origin of Lorna! :)

About the laughing at the CD'rs in the limelight. Isn't it funny how we can laugh at others when we relate with them? I punched my friend (in the shoulder) when he wore makeup once in High School. Meanwhile I was totally envious!

That was a great story Lorna. I didn't know you were engaged and that you were heartbroken when it didn't work out. :( I guess it's for the best though because it doesn't sound like Lorna would have been self actualized as quickly.

When I discovered you on the web, I had no idea you were only a couple of years into being out. I thought you'd been out for years because of your openess. I sure understand more now.

I too started with hose. I often fantasized about being a Legg's hose truck driver one day. :) You are right about the pantyhosed women being on television in the 70's and 80's. It was truly Must Hose TV back then.

I loved your story and you know I luv' you too! :) :wink: :)

Thanks Lorna for posting your story. It was mega cool!

Beauty
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CJ
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Post by CJ »

That was an awesome read, Lorna! :wink: Thanks for posting. :wink: Like Beauty, I had assumed, from reading your posts on the CDDF, that you were a long-standing gal, many years out.

You're gorgeous, by the way! :wink:

Love,
CJ
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Virginia
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Thanks

Post by Virginia »

I really enjoyed reading your post, best wishes, Love, Deborah
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!
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Anita
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Post by Anita »

Hi Lorna--
Well, I'll join the chorus. I thought you'd been out longer than that, too.
The road not traveled--your break-up--is something that can make you speculate. Would these same issues have come up? (probably) Could we have handled them together? (who knows?)

Is it better to have a femme self that you can fully express when you need to, or is it better to have a mate, even if she insists that you stifle the femme self? No easy answers, and Lord knows we've all asked them on these forums over the years.

Anyway--thanks for the sharing, and for now--Power to the Pretty!
Anita
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