Outed...I Think

How are you dealing with or handling this aspect of your life?

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Stephanie H
Miss Golden Goddess
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Location: Central Florida

Post by Stephanie H »

Erin L: Doors have a tendency to shut fast and hard. Remember, it is still cold outside and the discussion is most likely just as cold at this point in time
Stephanie
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Stephanie W
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Post by Stephanie W »

Erin

You could always promise her you'll buy her two new pairs if you ruin hers. What's she got to lose? The good thing is that she's giving you a little sneak peek into how she might react if/when the time comes to lay it all out there.

Stephanie
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Stephanie H
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Post by Stephanie H »

Erin:
Stephanie W has the greatest idea.
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Erin L
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Post by Erin L »

Stephanie's idea would have been great if the size issue had really been her concern. But I think it was just a cover for the fact that she was on the point of acknowledging my dressing in the open and then got cold feet. As I have posted before, the emotional tension under which we tend to operate makes it difficult to address anything new if we can avoid it.

My father in law is back to his own manipulative self, trying to make himself an object of pity so as to get his own way, and my new work responsibilities promise that I will be available slightly less often going forward. We always talk about how we can't rush into major decisions about how we want to go forward with our femme selves - whether it's hormone therapy, SRS, going out in public, or whatever. Well, I think that goes double with SOs. I've taken advantage of a couple of opportunities since the tights incident to talk about acceptance (generally) and sensitive natures (generally) to try to reintroduce the subject. No dice.
I'm not that kind of girl.
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Leeza
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Post by Leeza »

Erin, I am hopeing that your wife will come around to your way of thinking. Although we would like to make the changes like a race car, we have to remember most of us were many years learning to accept ourselves for what we are and are asking our SOs to do it in short order.

I know others have said it before, but sometimes we need reminded again.
At least it sounds like if you are in the "dog house" it is the one inside and not the outside one. lol

Leeza
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Stephanie W
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Location: Ontario, Canada

Post by Stephanie W »

Erin

I'm not surprised it might have more to do with her getting cold feet. You know your wife better than anyone so trusting your instincts is the right thing to do. I do understand how that emotional tension can make it hard to move forward. You probably don't need me to tell you the key to making any kind of progress hangs so often on the planets being aligned correctly, if you know what I mean. When that window of opportunity starts to close, you're better off just waiting for it to open again rather than trying to 'wedge' it open with ill timed discussion she may not be ready or in the mood for.

Hang in there girl! Patience is a wonderful virtue and all progress, however small is worth its weight in gold!

Stephanie
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Michelle Miller
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Post by Michelle Miller »

Erin, start off slowly. Tell her that you've begun your ninja training and need lots and lots of form-fitting, lightweight clothing, and really, the only acceptable thing you've been able to find is tights. Then move on to colors...Tell her you want to be Erin The Colorful Ninja! :mrgreen:
-Michelle-
"Inside me, there's a thin girl, screaming to get out, but cookies & ice cream usually shut her right up."
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Erin L
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Post by Erin L »

Stephanie, you've hit the nail on the head. I'll just bide my time for now.

Michelle - now, that IS an interesting approach!

Hugs,

Erin
I'm not that kind of girl.
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