Would you rather be a woman?
Moderators: KimberlyS, CathyAnn
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JoAnnDallas
- Miss Golden Goddess
- Posts: 992
- Joined: Tue Dec 05, 2006 1:59 pm
- Location: Fairfax, VA
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I know that when I am fully dressed as JoAnn, that I am NOT a attractive sexy woman. Besides what 61 year woman would. LOL When I look in the mirror at my femself, I see ME, a mature older woman who looks to be in her late 40's or early to mid 50's. As long as others preceive me as a woman when I am out dressed, then that is all I can ask for.
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Johanna
- Miss Sapphire Goddess
- Posts: 75
- Joined: Sat Dec 06, 2008 12:53 am
- Location: Florida
Reality vs. fantasy
I realize that most of us are inferior renditions of the real thing- beautifyl, young. women. Despite that, something inside of me yearns for the experience I never had. As Erin wirtes, to be female anjd beautiful (at least to the eyes of my man) and experience sex, dress, and life as a true female is an objectivbe I have. I know that I will never obtain the ideal, but still long for that ideal.
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JenniferPL
- Miss Crystal Goddess
- Posts: 24
- Joined: Sun Nov 16, 2008 7:14 am
- Location: Michigan
Going through life again as a male would be boring. Next time make it female. If I had a similar mind set, my choice would probably be lesbian, since I seem to be drawn to women. Hanging around guys talking about how fast my computer is, bores me to no end. As Jennifer often there are thoughts of what it would be like to have sex with a man. However, being controlled or dominated by man through is hard to think about.
Young women (twenties and younger) today have more opportunities and freedoms than their older sisters. It would be interesting to be young and female in this country. Ah to be young, beautiful, long blond hair with large breast along with long legs.
Young women (twenties and younger) today have more opportunities and freedoms than their older sisters. It would be interesting to be young and female in this country. Ah to be young, beautiful, long blond hair with large breast along with long legs.
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Absaroka
- Miss Diamond Goddess
- Posts: 3344
- Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2005 8:30 am
Is the question do we want to be women or is it do we want to be our own sexual fantasy? Both being completely reasonable questions appropriate to the forums and which should be asked.
My favorite answer to this so far is the one that basically says "What? Give up being bigendered?"
Absaroka
My favorite answer to this so far is the one that basically says "What? Give up being bigendered?"
Absaroka
everything under the sun is in tune
but the sun is eclipsed by the moon
but the sun is eclipsed by the moon
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Sandra Jane
- Miss Sapphire Goddess
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Diannna
- Miss Emerald Goddess
- Posts: 237
- Joined: Wed Jun 13, 2007 10:01 pm
- Location: High Desert, So. Calif.
Well, this thread escaped me some how. But to answer. First of all, it's a very hard question for myselfto answer. Everyone is different. Second, if I did wish I were born a female, then I probably wouldn't be able to know what it is or was to be male. There are times that I wish I were female but more often then not, I'm glad I am male. I'm 62 now and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. So for me, it's business as usual. I dress when I want and as often as I need to and enjoy. Having an s/o helps immensely. I think I would enjoy living female 24/7, but having too much family, I don't think it would work out. Life is supposed to be getting a little easier for me now, not harder. I enjoy who and what I am. That in itself took a long time to get to.
Hugs,
Diana
Diana
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Patti D
- Miss Platinum Goddess
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- Location: Alabama
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April Rose
- Miss Golden Goddess
- Posts: 893
- Joined: Sat Dec 06, 2008 10:18 pm
- Location: Massachusetts
I don't wish I had been born a woman. Being born bi-gendered, or a cross dresser, or whatever I am, has had its sad, lonely, anxious,frustrating and confusing moments, but it has led to who I am today, and to the relationships I have today. I am, for the most part, satisfied with who I have become, and I love my family as they are.
That said, with my responsibilities as a parent for the most part over,and with retirement not close, but on the horizon , I feel like I have earned my liberty, and I want my liberty.
With all possible consideration for my dear wife's level of comfort, from where I sit, that means not fighting the insistent call I feel toward a more feminine life. Going forward I intend to work at becoming a better homemaker, and a more nurturing person.
I don't want fantasy, or what might have been. I want to reject the assumed dichotomy of gender. At this stage of my life I need to explore the personal politics of becoming a womanly man.
That said, with my responsibilities as a parent for the most part over,and with retirement not close, but on the horizon , I feel like I have earned my liberty, and I want my liberty.
With all possible consideration for my dear wife's level of comfort, from where I sit, that means not fighting the insistent call I feel toward a more feminine life. Going forward I intend to work at becoming a better homemaker, and a more nurturing person.
I don't want fantasy, or what might have been. I want to reject the assumed dichotomy of gender. At this stage of my life I need to explore the personal politics of becoming a womanly man.
I am a vessel of the Goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.
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Robyn Katie
- Miss Platinum Goddess
- Posts: 380
- Joined: Thu Oct 02, 2008 5:02 pm
Hi sisters,
Interesting how much this thread is complementing the "the grass on the other side of the fence is dead" one Absaroka started at:
http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... hp?t=11070
Somehow the two seem to be forming a pair, all circling the same topic, the ways we slide (or don't) along the M-F scale, and the diverse ways we feel about it.
I'd like to see the two threads kept close together.
Love, Robyn Katie
Interesting how much this thread is complementing the "the grass on the other side of the fence is dead" one Absaroka started at:
http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... hp?t=11070
Somehow the two seem to be forming a pair, all circling the same topic, the ways we slide (or don't) along the M-F scale, and the diverse ways we feel about it.
I'd like to see the two threads kept close together.
Love, Robyn Katie
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Robyn Katie
- Miss Platinum Goddess
- Posts: 380
- Joined: Thu Oct 02, 2008 5:02 pm
Hi April Rose,
Just want to let you know how powerfully your post struck me. Though I may wish (sometimes) I'd been born a woman, what you say carries a lot of conviction for me.
It's true fantasy is powerful for me and an important part of my awareness of reality, though I do my best to know which is which.
Like you, though, in practical terms I'm satisfied with who I am today, and wouldn't trade my present life and relationships for anything. Becoming a more womanly man is the way forward, just as you have said. And you've said several more things that feel exactly right:
"I want my liberty." "Not fighting the insistent call I feel toward a more feminine life. "A more nurturing person."
I'm taking them to heart. They seem to be at the core of what so many of us have been aching to express. Thank you.
Love, Robyn Katie
Just want to let you know how powerfully your post struck me. Though I may wish (sometimes) I'd been born a woman, what you say carries a lot of conviction for me.
It's true fantasy is powerful for me and an important part of my awareness of reality, though I do my best to know which is which.
Like you, though, in practical terms I'm satisfied with who I am today, and wouldn't trade my present life and relationships for anything. Becoming a more womanly man is the way forward, just as you have said. And you've said several more things that feel exactly right:
"I want my liberty." "Not fighting the insistent call I feel toward a more feminine life. "A more nurturing person."
I'm taking them to heart. They seem to be at the core of what so many of us have been aching to express. Thank you.
Love, Robyn Katie
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April Rose
- Miss Golden Goddess
- Posts: 893
- Joined: Sat Dec 06, 2008 10:18 pm
- Location: Massachusetts
Robyn, thanks for your kind words. 
I would like to clarify one thing. I have nothing against fantasy, It's just that I got to a point where I got tired of using my imagination against myself. There can be an obsessive quality to our lifestyle that often seems to end in frustration, letdown, even depression. At some point it occurred to me that I should be using some of this fantasy energy to making myself more comfortable with myself, rather than just chasing an unattainable feminine ideal. My solution came from active daydreaming as much as anything else.
What I decided to do, and continue to do, is to pick out certain times every week when I wear dresses whether I feel like it or not. That doesn't mean I won't dress as a woman on other days. Sometimes every day!
This may not seem comfortable, or sensible, but once I started it, it was a revelation. That obsessive, longing quality has been greatly diminished.
Obviously, I am in women's clothing as much as ever, and my admiration for women has only increased.
But a habit is so much easier to live with than an obsession.
I would like to clarify one thing. I have nothing against fantasy, It's just that I got to a point where I got tired of using my imagination against myself. There can be an obsessive quality to our lifestyle that often seems to end in frustration, letdown, even depression. At some point it occurred to me that I should be using some of this fantasy energy to making myself more comfortable with myself, rather than just chasing an unattainable feminine ideal. My solution came from active daydreaming as much as anything else.
What I decided to do, and continue to do, is to pick out certain times every week when I wear dresses whether I feel like it or not. That doesn't mean I won't dress as a woman on other days. Sometimes every day!
This may not seem comfortable, or sensible, but once I started it, it was a revelation. That obsessive, longing quality has been greatly diminished.
Obviously, I am in women's clothing as much as ever, and my admiration for women has only increased.
But a habit is so much easier to live with than an obsession.
I am a vessel of the Goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.
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Bernice
- Miss Golden Goddess
- Posts: 615
- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2004 11:24 pm
- Location: Northeast Kansas
After 42+ years of considering this question, I'd choose to be born female. However, having been born male (at least on the exterior) the compromises I've already made (and the passing of time) complicate the notion of changing.
Warning: explicit content and potentially disturbing thoughts ahead!
There was a time when intercourse with a man seemed inconceivable to me. More recently, as I embrace and become at one with the thought of myself as a woman, having sex with another woman (if I was also equipped as a woman) seems inconceivable. I now fantasize of being a woman bound and forcibly frontally penetrated by a man or multiple men, repeatedly, perhaps as a sexual slave. It's not the thought of penetration that is repugnant - it's the thought of the lack of choice in who is doing the penetration. In my fantasies I don't ever see a face, just a chest, or I am blindfolded.
On rare occasion, I've noticed men who, were I properly equipped as female and not already in a committed relationship, just might be able to persuade me to engage in intimate relations, perhaps even with gentle bondage.
Still, men are typically pigs, and had I been born female, I would definitely have been a real prude. Oral and anal sex are very repugnant for me no matter what the genders involved, but that is just me. What others consensually do in their own bedrooms is none of my business.
Pleasant platonic hugs,
Bernice
Warning: explicit content and potentially disturbing thoughts ahead!
There was a time when intercourse with a man seemed inconceivable to me. More recently, as I embrace and become at one with the thought of myself as a woman, having sex with another woman (if I was also equipped as a woman) seems inconceivable. I now fantasize of being a woman bound and forcibly frontally penetrated by a man or multiple men, repeatedly, perhaps as a sexual slave. It's not the thought of penetration that is repugnant - it's the thought of the lack of choice in who is doing the penetration. In my fantasies I don't ever see a face, just a chest, or I am blindfolded.
On rare occasion, I've noticed men who, were I properly equipped as female and not already in a committed relationship, just might be able to persuade me to engage in intimate relations, perhaps even with gentle bondage.
Still, men are typically pigs, and had I been born female, I would definitely have been a real prude. Oral and anal sex are very repugnant for me no matter what the genders involved, but that is just me. What others consensually do in their own bedrooms is none of my business.
Pleasant platonic hugs,
Bernice
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Robyn Katie
- Miss Platinum Goddess
- Posts: 380
- Joined: Thu Oct 02, 2008 5:02 pm
April Rose,
I agree, having spent many years in the grip of the obsession, and only in recent years, as I began dressing female most of the time, have I begun to learn its habitual side.
I think making yourself wear a dress, like it or not, on a given day is a good way of forcing yourself into the reality of the feminine role. Not just a whim on the spur of the moment, but waking up, getting up, getting dressed as a woman and staying that way because that's what you are today, and that's what you do. Powerful indeed. And reassuring. It confirms you in your femaleness. A whole new landscape opens out before you, less desperate and more abiding.
Love, Robyn Katie
I agree, having spent many years in the grip of the obsession, and only in recent years, as I began dressing female most of the time, have I begun to learn its habitual side.
I think making yourself wear a dress, like it or not, on a given day is a good way of forcing yourself into the reality of the feminine role. Not just a whim on the spur of the moment, but waking up, getting up, getting dressed as a woman and staying that way because that's what you are today, and that's what you do. Powerful indeed. And reassuring. It confirms you in your femaleness. A whole new landscape opens out before you, less desperate and more abiding.
Love, Robyn Katie