Comprehending Engineers

[Karren Hutton]

Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." "The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."


To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.


A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude! The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him." [dramatic pause) "Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will saya special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact an ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"


An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."

[Azurielle]

Yay engineer jokes!

Honestly though, I wonder how many of us are engineers / technical degrees.

Also, BSME here.

[Carolynn]

Not me. I'm retired. Or retarded as my father said after he quit working. He said when he told people he was retired they acted like he had lost 60 IQ points, so he guessed they missunderstood and thought he was suddenly retarded!!

Carolynn

[DonnaT]

Honestly though, I wonder how many of us are engineers / technical degrees.

BSEE

[Elizabeth]

Hi girls,

While I don't have a BSEE, as a Master Electrician, it entitled me to engineer. In fact it granted me PEE status in that I could submit my own plans and designs to plan check without the stamp of a PEE. However, as with a PEE, the licensing test is quite difficult with a 2% first time pass rate.

Also there are a lot of women EE's and seems to be a field we excel in.

Love always,
Elizabeth

[Anne]

BSEE

"You can't have geek without double E"

Great jokes Karren!

Anne