Guilt

[Wendae]

My wife has agreed to let me dress at home and to attend a support group once a month and go to my psycologist also once a month dressed. The problem is I want to dress more frequently and get out of the house. I'm just uncomfortable being around her when I'm dressed and or telling her I need to get out. I know it hurts her to see me as Wendae and that hurts me. The problem is that the pressure is building up and I want to scream or run out the door. Wish I could get away for awhile to be me.
I am dressed at home today but we stay apart as much as possible. I am being helpful and have hung out the wash. It's a beautiful day here in Tampa. I've added 2 pictures to my gallery.

[Requal Jo]

It is very difficult when we come out to our wives and SOs Wendae. They experience mixed emotional feelings just like we do and sometime a small change is hard for them to comprehend.

MY wife is accepting of my dressing but would act the same as your wife if I was to suggest I buy a wig and wear make up, let alone go out dressed. I understand your frustration as I have similar feelings at times. I would love nothing more that to get out of town by myself for weekend and just be Requal Jo but I would not do this and jeperdise my long and happy marriage.

I have found by taking things slowly and over time my wife is becoming more accepting. She is now doing my washing and ironing (not that I expect her to) which is a great leap forward.

While I accept that it maybe difficult for you; patience and time will prevail.

[Rony]

Wendae
Looked at recent photos, looks like you've lost some weight.

Ronnie

[Wendae]

Thanks Rony! I've lost over 20 lbs. since the surgery and avoiding alcohol.

[Eileen (SO)]

For anyone that does not live with feelings of the alternate gender, it's very difficult to understand. Why would anyone want to assume the opposite gender? Even being gay or lesbian is not the right answer. There is no right answer except it feels good. After a decade of struggling to understand, the guy is gay, wants to become woman, I'm not a good enough female partner. It goes on and on.
I have learned, as far as my relationship goes, he needs to dress femme on occasion and has no intent on becoming a full time woman. I can live with that, as long as there is discretion in the neighborhood. I don't want the neighbors to know I live with a guy who wears dresses.

That all said, Wendae, do you wish to be dressed most of the time at home? My guy dresses for monthly meetings and a few other outings. He is shy being in front of me and I try to give constructive criticism. If he's going to be dressed as a woman, at least look right. If Wendae needs more femme time while at home, she is intruding on the wife's relationship with her husband. Please understand that very few woman understand the cross dresser and her needs.
Do your meetings and try not to push the femme side into everyday activities. From my point of view, I'm happy to have my hubby find his inner gal, but I don't want to live with her.

Eileen

[Eileen (SO)]

Requal Jo,

"She is now doing my washing and ironing." Really? You have your wife doing your femme washing? Geesh, that would never happen. My guy has always done his work clothes as they are too much soiled for regular laundry. But, I'll be Dam**d if I'll wash 'her' panties, bras, tops and skirts. You want to dress as a lady, do laundry like one also. You can wear heels to make it feel better.
It's little things like this that may make a wife less accepting. Doing laundry for three people when only two live there.

Eileen

[Wendae]

Eileen...

I have learned, as far as my relationship goes, he needs to dress femme on occasion and has no intent on becoming a full time woman. I can live with that, as long as there is discretion in the neighborhood. I don't want the neighbors to know I live with a guy who wears dresses.

My wife's feelings as well. I do fully understand your feelings
I don't wish to be dressed at home around my wife and would rather be else where while doing so.