Wow has it been that long?

[Christina Kay]

Never really felt like I fit in. 6 1/2 years of age GI Joe 1st appeared , a doll an action doll I could play with, would dress him in my sisters Barbie stuff , a really tight fit for poor Joe. Started crossdressing about age 10-11 ,,,,the usual panties and bra, slips OMG. Knew I was different , thought I was the only person in the world like that.

Then puberty hit , had the usual wide hip thin top boy development , also had gynecomastia....really was built and developing like a girl .....but being a teenage boy with breasts was a nightmare to say the least,,,,,,latter part of puberty started getting built more guy like , I was devastated,but still suffered from Gyno.

Discovered who Christine Jorgensen was ,oh my , I am not so different after all . Thought when I got married It the CDing would go away ,,,nope,incidents of getting caught with womens bras and an interest in TS's. After more than 30yrs of marriage came out to my wife , thought I was just a CDer , no the rabbit hole is much to deep, realize I suffer from gender issues. So this is the path I am walking right now....very troubling to realize this is a very slippery slope....so that is a synopsis of my journey



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[Rader]

Aretha:
I remember Christine Jorgensen, now I know how old you are, only people my
age would remember her. In a way she spire headed the CD or Trans. movement.
Like you, I suddenly felt that I was pt alone in this world.
Rader

[Carol Ann]

Rader,

Oh yes I remember Christine but at that age I really didn't understand
Well I do now

[Requal Jo]

Yes it appears to be a slippery slope but it not all down hill Aretha. Yes I to remember Christine and had at that time a desire to be like her but the feelings diminished. I have continued to take a great interest in TG stories. One recent one was the Australian Army Officer who came out and now lives as Clare. (She is even a personal friend of our Prime Minister who has openly accepted Clare's life).

I am certain that you will find firm support and sound advice from the wonderful and experience persons at this site.

[Carol Esme]

Christine Jorgensen and April Ashley contributed a lot to my TG education.

[Janine O]

I remember Christine Jorgensen as if it were yesterday. I was 12 at the time and thought that there may possibly be a solution to my confusion about gender.

[Anita]

Hi Christina--
Your early puberty period sounds very painful. Boys are constantly on the lookout for any kind of difference that they can make fun of, and having breasts and a girl-like appearance is hard to compensate for with other achievements. You came out to your wife of 30 years, and were writing about it in February. Do you care to post any updates on how that is going?

There seemed to be a big gap between Christine Jorgensen and the next gal, which was Renee Richard. Jorgensen was newsworthy in 1952 and on; Richard was notable from 1975 on. At least here in the U.S., there was no other prominent figure in that middle period. I was aware of Jan Morris, because I read her travel articles in Rolling Stone in the 70s.

I remember reading an article in our weekly local paper about women who were living fulltime and transitioning with surgery. It was a sympathetic article, and it took the stance of, "This is going on all the time around here, and you're not aware of it." I had to agree--trans women were not on my radar at all, in 1993. I was aware that I felt a certain kinship with them, because of my CDing as a teen. It was a distant kinship, though, kind of, "Gee, those poor people, having to deal with wanting to be a woman." Very ironic that 11 years later, I would find myself leading the support group that the article mentioned.

I wish you the best in this difficult time, Christina. It's harder when someone else is involved. I'm grateful I did not have to deal with that.

Christine Jorgensen visited our support group, back in the 70s, according to a founding member who attended some meetings. He said when the group started, in 1973?, it was more about CDing. Now the group is 99% transitioned women.

[Christina Kay]

Came out to my wife last October. Things are slowly getting better. She realizes as I do that I will not transition. Have been going to a gender therapist, since I posted last. I have worked through a lot of my gender issue stuff,,,but it's really just the tip of the iceberg.

Yes I have suffered with GD my whole life. I have started on low dose hrt, under my Doctors supervision. I know there are some who might question the rapid pace of this. The hrt in under 12hrs, I felt the effects. A calm swept over me, my frustration level with doing some tasks. Disappeared . My reactive temper ,,,gone. I feel balanced and normal for the first time in my life.

So more blood work in another month. And we will adjust accordingly. My wife though apprehensive at first can see the mental change in me. She no longer feels like she walking on eggshells around me.

Through the many long talks we have had,,,,She surmised that I was like having PMS constantly till the estrogen helped balanced my brain. Yes there are worries about what physical changes occur to me. This is mostly about the mental balance it has brought
.
You do tend to lessen in desire to crossdress. My feminine mannerisms are more understated now. But there 24/7, and yes I have to be aware and not be girlfriends all the time. But it is easier to now to deal with other men. Though I sometimes now see them through a quasi womens viewpoint.

For me they(horomones) literally saved , my sanity. I was hitting the wall hard with this GD. Thankfully I had a gender therapist who after two visits said your PCP should really know about this.

That was as hard telling him my life story. I have been a patient of his for over 20yrs. So with one attempt at anti depressant therapy. Just made everything worse , and the ED from them ,really freaked me out. As of low dose hasn't had that same effect. But my wife and I discussed about the possibility of that(ED) from hrt and if need be a little pharmaceutical help. And my PCP agrees.

So there is my update. Will update again in about a month.


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