First time out tomorrow En Femme

[Martina Hall]

As far as the voice goes, I try to speak softly. Just that simple. We can't really change our voices, rather try to smooth it out by almost-whispering.

[Kelly]

Hi Babbs,

Voice and its impact is multi dimensional.

One dimension is your perception and the perception of others. From self, if you are concerned then it will be an obvious tell (if that even matters). The easier said thing here is eliminate the concern. That comes from attitude and confidence. Remember, you look good - even hot, maybe - and you aren't hurting anybody, and in a place of commerce your money is green. Assume the attitude: 'you gotta problem? Well its all yours, not mine'.

Now the perception of others. They really aren't as perceptive as you think. Undercover, go out sometime as listen, really listen, to the voices of the GGs out there. There are lots of low voices. Others actually sound unnatural. Few are the ideal, melodic you just want to listen to all day voices that you hear in the movies or audios. Two points here. First there is a large area where you can be acceptable, but not perfect. Second, if you were not really listening, would you have noticed?

OK, so you don't think you land in the passable area. You're probably right. So what do you do about it. The one good suggestion is to speak softly. That works in a lot of offhanded, casual situations. But when you speak softly the listener pays more attention to you just to hear what you are saying, so your not going to have many prolonged conversations. Everything else takes work, several months worth.

If you want to commit to this work there are a couple three approaches. Engage with a speech pathologist, purchase some of the self-help courses available on the net, or go it alone based on a lot of internet reading. The first is going to cost you some bucks, the others carry a risk of injury and blind alley. And you are talking about several months of daily effort to see reasonable results for any case.

I can go on ad-infinitum on the details. If you like we can spin up another thread to talk about these things; or dip into a PM conversation.

To me working on voice is important. It isn't to everybody. And guess what, if you read the history of this forum, there are a lot of girls that have been very successful without worrying about voice. Which goes back to the whole confidence thing. A confident CDer that does everything else well, but has a Berry White voice isn't going to have (many) problems.

Just go out and have fun and feel good.

Kelly.

[Babbs]

Good advice Kel ! I think your so right about the confidence aspect. As long a s I'm comfortable and confident the way I feel, what else matters. Although for me I think I will still practice speaking daily in the car alone because ultimately I would like to get the whole femme thing right...i feel good with the look, walk etc.. (although they still need much refinement) so I want to feel good about the talk.

[Crystal]

Congratulations on finding the courage to do what some of us can not. And though I have not gone out, many here are right: It's about your mindset. The old saying is true and you proved it: If you think you can or you can not, you are right!

Must have been chilly in NH. I know I used to live there

And a redhead?? I bet you looked great, said my drab side hehehe