A Minor Milestone

[Celia]

Today, for the first time, I went to work fully dressed. But . . . the outfit was pretty androg and could probably have been taken as guys' clothing with a flair.

[Kelly]

That's neat!!!

Doesn't matter how the outfit could have been taken by a co-worker. What matters is how you felt while wearing it!!!!!

Hope it felt good.

Kelly

[Carol Ann]

way to go girl

[Anita]

I'm with Kelly--I hope it felt good. May there be other days to follow this one!

[Celia]

Today was another such day.

[Requal Jo]

Way to go Celia. Congratulations.

[Alexandria]

yesterday and today were a minor milestone for a 63 year old coach former teacher. On the you tube a nice young lady middle age to you probably, said you can go into a store and buy what you need when you want because nobody really cares and it's none of their business. Before listening to her I had planned to finally go to Walmart get out my trusty credit card and purchase my supplies at the self help counter in as much privacy as I could get. Yet here was I who had not dressed in over 2 months just dying to get that lipstick on again and feel that self pleasure of my softer insides even though I could never pass on the outside not even to a blind person. Yet I needed that beautiful lipstick on my lips going over with the help of my mirror. I saw a nice middle aged black woman at the counter smiling. I approached her and told her that I had my checkbook without an id and no credit card but $54 in cash. We talked about her 8 kids and my 6 kids all grown and how after a number of years she just had to get out of the house. I put down my stuff and said let's send my shorts through last in case I run out of cash. We need to get my wife's stuff first - three lipsticks, make up bag, eye shadow, and 5 cotton women's underwear. Well we totaled it up and it came to $53.98 cents. I thanked her and headed to the bathroom and got into the stall sat down, got out my mirror and finally got to put that beautiful lipstick on over and over again the for the next 20 minutes. Two months without was a long time. As I sat in the stall I thought I am 63 this is worse than trying to buy cigarettes when I was young. I remembered over 20 years going into a drug store purchasing $3.00 worth of stuff. Then I went back in the store and got what I really wanted 3 different shades of red lipstick. I stole that lipstick which cost about $3.00 and yet I didn't steal the lipstick because I left the $3.00 item I had bought in the store to pay for the stolen lipstick. My wife never forgave me of that and for the next 10 to 15 years was really bothered by that as I found out about 2 months ago. I had went to my woman dr and finally broke down telling her about my some 30 years of secret cross dressing. She arranged for me to see counselor. Part of me detests this in me, and yet today I sit at home typing this with the wife gone in my black cotton women's underwear with a little frill on top. I have a combination of red wine lipstick on with my beautiful pink lipstick on, some green and pink eye shadow on. I even put one of my wife's moisturizers on my skin, I shaved a little of my hair off on my chest especially around my small fatty breasts from high blood pressure. I feel really silly writing all this but today and yesterday I am part girly my dear Alexandria. I don't know what I will do in the end, but from now on I will buy my lipstick for myself. I am wondering whether to get a short blonde wig or long one. I am even thinking someday of shaving more body hair and even someday trying that beautiful nail polish that I lust after. Hugs Alexandria

[Diana Michelle]

Way to go Celia and Alexandria! We all have to take that first step into the light regardless of our age, situation, or circumstances.

I remember my first time out oh so many years ago, although probably the scariest outing I had was on Wednesday January 2, 1980. I know the date well because I officially began my RLT on January 1st, 1980. That was the day I went to work for the first time presenting myself totally as a female. Back then businesswomen and that was what I now was wore skirted suits for the professional look. Even though it is in my diary I don't even have to look as I remember the outfit well down to the last minute detail. I was so scared I almost backed out but my boss had been such a sweetie and supportive of my choice I knew I had to do it! My knees were trembling and my hands shaking as I drove to work that morning. Obviously Chris either had explained the situation well or just plain laid down the law because it was actually very anti-climatic. I think the only incident that day I caused myself. I went to go to the bathroom and was halfway in when one of my co-workers came out and I realized I was walking into the men's room! I guess old habits die hard.

[Alexandria]

Diana Michelle, Bless your boss Chris to go to bat for you like that. Back in 1980 34 years ago it was not that friendly a place or society. It is people like you Diana Michelle who give us closeted cd's a little courage to go and buy supplies at Walmart. Even though it is a small step, we have to start somewhere. I salute you. Hugs Alexandria

[Karen Ski]

Hooray Celia! Way to go girl! It is exhilarating to go somewhere so familiar as the person you want to be rather than bounded by the "norms" of what society expects. I remember the first time I did it. Granted it was on a Saturday and no one was around but still it was a huge step! Keep it up Celia, I will be watching for updates.