Shopping--It Never Felt So Good

[Laura]

Hi all,

I wanted to share something with you girls to see if any of you have had similar experiences and results. I also wanted to suggest a way that some of you girls can get out as your fem selves without necessarily having to dress in public. So, here's the story.

I’ve been feeling more and more "under the gun" regarding work and responsibilities lately. More tension and stress. I told myself that I needed an outing for Laura, but I kept putting it off due to so many things to do. You know how it can get.

Finally, I decided to go to Dress Barn and go early so I had enough time to just enjoy. (I went dressed in my male clothes.) A saleslady met me and when I said I wanted to look at dresses, she asked who is it for? I said “Me,” without any sense of embarrassment. (I was proud of myself for that) So, she took me around the store; and then I opened up to her about what kind of dress or skirt I wanted—one that would give me curves. She was so helpful. Later, I asked whether she had served any guys who buy women’s clothes, and she said, “Oh yes, all the time. I used to work at Victoria’s Secret and men would come to buy bustiers for themselves.” Then I told her that I was transgendered; no big deal. Meanwhile, she showed me a few dresses that she had bought for herself and which she thought were flattering on her figure. Well, pretty soon I was in the dressing room trying on dresses and looking at myself with a critical eye and doing a little preening as well—but no fear or tension. I finally chose a beautiful bias cut, flowery peach color, chiffon dress, which made me look slim and “sleek” (as she said), but was having a few second thoughts about it. As I was talking to her near the sales desk, she asked me about jewelry and then she helped me to look through the jewelry that would go with the dress. When I mentioned scarves we looked at those too, and then when I asked her how she wore them, she showed me a number of styles. I tried on several scarves and one stole in the middle of the store! We were just talking and talking, very naturally, just like two women would. Then, I told her I was having second thoughts about the dress, and she showed my some dressy wide pants (they look like a dress but are really pants); then we went around the store looking for pants. I asked her then if she would give me opinions on what looked good on me. So, while she waited outside the dressing room, I would try something on and ask her opinion. She agreed with me what looked best and I ended up buying the pants and a sequined top. I felt sexy in both of them. She spent more than two hours with me!!! I was very thankful and told her so, in the course of which she told me how much she loved doing her job.

So here it is, days later, and I feel so happy and calm and grounded. It was just what I needed. All the tension, all the feeling of being put upon is dissipated. Looking back, it felt like someone was talking to and relating to Laura even though I was speaking in my normal voice. Or perhaps, more accurately, it was that I was conversing with the saleslady as who I truly am; a bi-gendered person who accepts him/her self (which, unfortunately, I don't do all the time).

For me, these outings are the only way I can bring sanity or balance back into my life. And at least at this stage of my progression, I was happy that I didn't have to go out dressed. I could dress in the privacy of a dressing room AND end up trying on practically half the dresses in the store. It ended up being a happy compromise.

And I'm the happier for it,

love,

Laura

[Loretta Ann]

Thank you for sharing that experiance with us Laura. I am sure that is something you can treasure for a long time.

I am happy for you, "enjoy."

[Sally]

Hey Laura, what a great story, it must have been a real hoot for you. You'll never regret taking the plunge and being upfront with the saleslady.

There are many people who never wish to go public about their crossdressing but there are also so many who would love to be able to rustle up the courage to get out there and shop openly for themselves, once the ice is broken and we find out just how easy it is life then takes a new upward lift.

I've had some wonderful times and lots of fun shopping, I can't remember ever being rejected, it's never really as difficult as we first perceive and a sale is a sale to the shop keeper, no matter who does the purchasing. The only little problem which ever arises on the odd occaison is the need to have a lady scan the fitting room for me in some shops, before I use it and they always do that willingly.

I can remember one time which was quite amusing some years ago when myself and two friends were in a large shopping centre one saturday morning and we were window shopping along the ladies boutiques when we came across a stunning dress in a window, which took our eye instantly. We had spent some time looking and discussing the dress when we noticed three salesladies standing together in the shop, all grinning towards us. We gave them a little wave and big smiles and as we did one of the women came out of the shop to us and asked if one of us wanted to try the dress on. It came as a mild surprise to us because we were all dressed in male mode, but as we talked with her she told us that she often sold womens wear to males and we were welcome at any time, she also said they had picked us right off. It just went to strengthen the fact that even though we may think we are the odd one out, there are more men shopping for ladies wear than most imagine.

Actually, later the next week I went back and bought that little LBD, it wasn't a cheap dress but it's stood me in good stead many a time, it never dates and has turned out to be one of my better purchases. I would say that if she hadn't come out and approached us to try it on I would probably never have gone back and bought it, it was just her lovely warm friendly manner which made such a hit with me and after I tried the dress on I just had to have it, it was made for me. I have also continued to be a steady customer of her's, it's nice to interact with nice people.

I'm so glad you gained as much as you did from the experience, it's important we do the things which make us the happiest.

My Kindest Regards.

Sally.

[Gaven McLaren]

Bravo Laura. While I shop for stuff I have never gotten the nerve to try any thing on in the store much less tell the sales person that it was for me. The closest I have ever come was last year or the year before I cannot remember exactly but I was at Big 5 Sporting Goods as they were having a sale on one piece Speedo suits. The manager asked if I wanted to try it on first because there is no returns on swimware. I was shocked first and then I thought about it and said no as I am a good guess on sizes and how they will fit me. Just so you know if you look at my pics The blue swimsuit I am wearing is the one I bought that day.

[Beauty]

Hi Laura,

That was a great story! I love reading stories like yours and Sally's!

Thank you for posting it here!!! I'm glad you had a most excellent time!!!

Beauty

[Virginia]

Laura and Sally,
Well Ladies perhaps we are making more inroads than some of us suspect. If it gets "too easy" then the "rush" will be gone and all we can do is walk around lookng beautiful - of course that may force some of the GG's to start improving on their appearance!.
Love, Deborah

[Erica Shade]

I wish all my shopping experiences where like yours. Life would be so different if we could just walk in, browse, try on, and purchase what ever we liked. I'm too nervous to do that. In my city, there is a store that caters to CDs. I've gone in there and felt very comfortable.

Nuff Luv,

Erica Shade

[Laura]

Hi girls,

For those of you thinking of going shopping and using the dressing room, let me offer a few thoughts. In a sense, it is easy but you have to get past the hard part, which is a measure of self-acceptance. (at least that is my experience) By that I mean, the inner belief that what you are doing is morally and socially right and is necessary for you. If you can approach salesladies with that inner confidence, then they will accept you and help you out--some more than others.

There is a whole other world that is opening up for me, which is relating to people as Laura. I LOVE it! It makes dressing in private so boring. After seeing me in my new outfit, a man in my men's support support group thought I looked a bit like a model he once knew. I won't try to pretend that I am beautiful--I know too well my many flaws--but if you don't go out, you won't get positive comments. That comment has give me more confidence and makes me feel more feminine (and having that feeling is what it's all about). He wants to go shopping with me to help me pick out some clothes. Hmmm. I said yes. Anything for beauty.

Kisses,

Laura

[Anita]

Hi Laura--
That's a great post, and certainly left ME feeling good at the end of it. I have been amazed at my rapport with saleswomen sometimes, and it does turn into just two girls talking. That's the nearest I can describe it, because those conversations are unlike any I ever have had before with women.

I'm glad you continue to go to the support group as Laura.
A