SCC -2004

[Virginia]

Well I will post this here as I HAD A BALL!!!!!!!!!!!!
I will apologize to all my sisters from the forum who I hope were there!! I hope some of you were able to get together with each other. I am sorry I missed you, but with nearly 700 girls running around and not having a name, room number or visible badges made it tough to find anyone. I can only hope and pray you had a good a time as I did! I absolutely loved it!!!!!
HOpe you ladies don't mind but I will be brief - and maybe not
I spent Wed. night in Anderson, North of Atlanta, dressed, got in my little red sports car and down I-85 I went - about an hour or so. easily found the hotel and did it ever bring back some memories when I saw it. Initially the name did not ring a bell untill I saw it and in 1976 my wife and I were there and had only been married for about six months and we were........... well the maid walked in on us!!!
Moving right along. I parked in the hotel's underground lot and after determining that the elevator was definitely not working, I found an escalator which to me up to.... the adjacent mall at 12:10 pm right in the middle of the Food Court!!!!!! Virginia just threw her head back, chest out - Big Smile and right through the middle of it!! Gots lots of "excuse me Maam! and pardon me Maam etc. It was wonderful. Picnic Thursday, sat with a girl asked her were she was from - unbelieveable!!!! Virginia!!! Williamsburg to be exact - other end of the state but who's uh thunk it!? a fellow Virginian!
Lunch Friday, two ladies sitting at a table alone! "May I join you?" "Certainly" chat, chat, chat, "Uh, were are you ladies from if I may ask?"
"Oh, a little town in Tennessee, near Nashville, you probably never heard of it - Cookeville?!"
I like to have fell out in the floor.- "Well ladies, sorry to disappoint you, but I are a cullege gredudeate from Tennessee Tech in Cookeville,Tennessee!!!" Now they like to have fainted! Who'd uh thunk it!!! One worked in the engineering dept and I think the other in education.
Saturday night, I sat with a lady from Nashville, who not only knew the current president of our local TG association, but did not realize she was sitting at the same table with her and when I introduced them and they found they had worked together with the same legislator and she had lived here in Roanoke back in '98. Gheesh girls!! you can run but you can't hide!
I attended the 2005 planning session, mainly to publicly express my thanks for all the hard work that went into putting this show on. Having participated in annual conferences annually for about 25 years but with 12,000 to 15,000 attendees I know what goes into it.
Girls I will say this, it was like a lot of the love, warmth, empathy, understanding was transferred to Atlanta. What an absolutely marvelous group!!! They also have qualified for a IRC 501 (c)(3) status under the IRS code, so any deductions we make to the organization are now tax deductible!!!
They offer "scholarships" to some who want to attend but have financial problems and a couple of the receiptents were there and gave the most heart rendering thanks - I cried!!!!
Not thought about, but very hearting, three (that I saw) crossdressers - in wheelchairs!!!! Isn't that marvelous!!!! I talked to one briefly and she is just like you and I only she has wheels under her butt!!!!
I left with one abiding appreciation among many! I have a MUCH better understanding of what GG's go through! I had no "en drab" clothing and if I wanted to go out it was as one of our sister's says -- DIGA (dressed in girl's attire) changing, clothes, breaking a nail, manuipliting buttons and zippers, and shoe straps with partially dried , long nails, remove and reapply make-up two or three times a day and (for us OH! God! shaving twice a day! - My poor face may never recover), deciding what to wear to what event. One thing for those who have never gone out! Looking good and/or passing never even entered my mind! - Now I am not bragging, but I know I looked good, and I got complimented by various ladies on every outfit that I wore and on my "hair."
Please if anyone reads this that was there - it is not meant to be a derogitory statement- but some of the "girls" whould not have passed at a blind man's convention, but it was beautiful - they did not give a damn! They were having fun and that was all that mattered! It was fantastic!
I will share one other thing not about the convention, but I came across a wreck in the opposite side of the interstate, two girls, both in excess of 350 pounds each had hit, ------- on a six lane interstate - mind you!" had hit the lead car in a funeral procession - yes, the hurse!!! and and and the casket was sittting out in the middle of the interstate and traffic --aahhhh, fortunately going the other way was backed up for miles!!!!!
Girls! beg, borrow, steal,, but plan to go to SCC next year in Atlanta! Oh! what a fantastic time!! and the seminars, I did not even touch on those! Abosolutely wonderful!!!!!!
Enough and again I feel partly in not entirely respoonsible for us not getting together while there, next year we will get better coordination.
Questions???????
Missed being here and I thought of you girls a lot!!
Oh there were several girls from England , Scotland, and Thailand, and I am sure other countries!
Love ya,
Virginia

[Elizabeth]

Virginia,

Wow, I can hear the exhuberance in your post. I am so glad you have such a wonderful time. Living in LA on disability with 3 kids, it is not likely I will make the SCC 2005. However, I am sure there is something equivelent in the Greater Los Angeles area, perhaps I will make one of those events.

I would definitely come under the catagory of not passing at a blind man's convention, but it does not keep me from feeling great, as you described our fellow sisters.

I'm sorry, and I know this is bad, but for some reason I just could not help but laugh at the mental picture in my mind had a hurse in an accident, and a casket in the middle of the road. I hope that person had a great sense of humor and the family did not feel a sense if having thier dignity robbed, but it is funny to picture.

I look forward to a more detailed debriefing in the days to come.

Love always,
Elizabeth

[Julie M.]

Virginia,

I never doubted for a moment your reaction. I was anxiously waiting for your "report". Your enthusiasm sounded a lot like mine when I got back from Be-All. There's something magical about being able to be yourself without restrictions for days on end.

So you found the face suffered? That's the down side but it sounds like you did what I did - grin and bear it! I loved reading how you left all your drabs at home. No getting lazy and falling back on that! But as you found having to dress puts you in situations that you wouldn't normally have been in. And the results are usually pretty interesting and sometimes downright funny.

I am so happy you enjoyed yourself so much. It's an expereince no CD should go to their grave without enjoying at least once.

Julie

PS: I wonder if your life will change like mine has. For me, it's been for the better.

[Virginia]

This is actually funny to me!! Here I sit trying desparately to talk with my girlfriends here, listen to the ball game on TV and ague with my wife (soon to be ex) over property settlements. Bless her heart, I did not realize how much I had sheltered her, the poor girl does not know "squat" about any of our assets, tax implications, income and out-go. She is taking our Jag and I get the truck and tonight she said it was not fair because the Jag did not do well in snow, so I offered the truck to her and of course that is too "manly" a vehicle for a lowly girl to drive. So I made the comment that it was not fair for her to make bad decisions then expect someone else to have to pay for them - she went off to bed - Night honey!!!
Sorry girls, I won't bring it up anymore.
Virgina

[DonnaT]

Glad you had a good time Virginia, et al.

Question, did any of the girls that dressed not shave?

I would like to go, dressed, but my wife won't let me shave. Can't go in 2005 anyway, as it is our 30th aniversary and the plans are to go to Hawaii, if we can scrape and save enough.

As for the jag, it would make a good trade for a all wheel drive Subaru.

[Virginia]

Hey Donna,
There was some stubble/five"o clock shadow, can't say that I saw any "permanent" facial hair. I did see.. well I will leave it at that right now!
As of for the Subaru, nice car but it won't pull my 6000 pound boat. for that matter neither would that Jag!
Love,
Virginia

[Angie]

Virginia,

Hey, girl! Sorry I missed you and the other ladies from the forum, but like you, I was overwhelmed by the sheer number of attendees. I did make it down to the registration table Saturday morning, just a few minutes after your shift was scheduled to end. Being late was my modus operandi for the whole week.

My only complaint was that there was so much to do, that it seemed impossible to pace oneself. Several conference topics sounded very interesting, but I only managed to make it to two of them. Then there was the film festival. I took in "Southern Comfort" on Saturday afternoon. Just can't figure out how society's intolerance can extend to those who swear the Hippocratic Oath. People are people, I guess.

I must confess that I went to the conference partly to convince myself that I really had little in common with most transgendered folks. I expected to meet some friendly people, but not strike up any real friendships. Nothing could have been further from the truth. What I found was that many of these wonderful people had uncannily similar hobbies, professions, habits, etc. to my own. I had more in common with them, than with many of my closest friends outside of the TG community. More than anything else, I came away from the event with a genuine sense that it's ok to be a crossdresser. Now I'm looking forward to next year's SCC like a kid waiting for Christmas morning.

To reiterate Virginia's post, by all means make plans to attend next year, if possible. Short of our community here on this forum, you will not find a more welcoming group of people. Don't sweat the shaving thing (except for the face). I saw arms with hair, though I think most of the girls did shave legs (or wore dark hose). As for voices, most seemed to opt for a more quiet version of their natural voice, though there were several "sports announcers" in attendance. Some ladies had put a lot of work into their female voice, but this was the minority, in my opinion.

BTW, Virginia, I know I'm not Marilyn Monroe, but REALLY! I thought I could at least pass at a blind man's convention!

Take Care
Angie

[Jamie Ann]

I agree with Angie and Virginia that it was awfully hard to find others from the forum. With hundreds of CDs and others with non-standard gender identities or presentations at the conference, it was almost impossible to find particular people. I looked around, but did not find any of those I thought I might find.

Still, I had a great time. I drove Thursday night to Doraville, Georgia, which is northeast of Atlanta. At Doraville, I boarded the MARTA train and traveled to the hotel in downtown Atlanta. After checking in Thursday night, I did my nails and shaved my legs, also setting out the clothes I wanted to wear on Friday. I watched the end of the Presidential Debate while I was doing these things.

On Friday morning, I went to the SCC Registration Area and picked up my packet of items (name tag, meal tickets, and other items). Then I attended a seminar entitled “The Politics of Transgender Identity” given by Dr. Wally Bacon, a political scientist at the University of Nebraska. Essentially, his pitch is that we need to form alliances and try to get “gender identity” and “gender presentation” added to the existing hate crime legislation. It is still perfectly legal in the United States to harrass (or worse) CDs who seem different — simply because they seem different.

Then I went to another seminar given by Mara Keisling and Lisa Moffet, which also had to do with the struggle for gender equality. Mara is a lobbyist in Washington D.C. and Lisa is a lawyer working in Washington on issues of equality for CDs and like-minded others.

After that, I went to the Grand Ballroom for lunch, which was a nice meal, although more food than I usually eat for lunch. Toward the end of the meal, Vicki Lee, a British woman involved in transgender publishing, gave a talk

Then I attended a seminar called “Photo Perspectives from the Gender Frontier” by Mariette Pathy Allen, an author and consultant on various documentaries about transgendered persons. This was a slide-show of photos on persons who had broken new ground. I did not know much about this history, but I found the presentation very interesting.

The seminars last about 1½ hours each. Thus, you could fit two into a morning, another two into the afternoon. My second afternoon seminar was “Makeup 101” by Susie Paris, who is a professional makeup artist from New York City. Although none of the information was totally new to me, I was interested in her ideas about eyebrows, covering beard shadow, and other makeup problems often faced by CDs.

After this seminar, I felt like I had been through a full day, so I went back to my room for a while and read through the conference materials I had received at registration that morning. Before long, it was time to return to the Grand Ballroom for dinner and a talent show that followed dinner. Lunches and dinners are a time to meet new people and talk. I sat at a table with some CDs I had not known previously, also some FtM transsexuals. It is very interesting to talk with members of other groups such as the FtM transsexuals, who are remarkably “normal men” except for having been born as genetic women.

That night, I took the shuttle to LeBuzz for a couple of hours of relaxation. LeBuzz is a TG-friendly nightclub whose usual clientelle is gay men, but on this particular night, as you might imagine, the majority of those present were beautiful “ladies like us”!

Since I did not get back to the Sheraton until about 1:30 a.m., I was not eager to jump out of bed in time for the morning seminars. I slept until about ten, then read the paper, took a shower, put on my makeup, went downstairs and chatted with others who were milling around in the lobby, and then went to lunch at the Grand Ballroom. At the end of the lunch period, the speaker was Calpernia Addams, who is a transsexual woman who fell in love with a soldier. If you have seen the movie, “Soldier's Girl,” that movie is based on the real-life story of Calpernia Addams. Her partner was murdered by other soldiers when he confided to one of them that the girl he was dating had been born male. The movie is basically a love story, but it also illustrates the intolerance that continues to plague the military and societies more generally.

After lunch, I went to a seminar entitled “Braving the Wilderness of Intimacy” given by Dr. Virginia Ehrhardt. This was a popular seminar; it had about 30 or more people in attendance. We all sat in a circle and each person who wished told how they had confided their CDing to their significant others. One person had been married for 26 years before he finally opened up to his wife. Others had other interesting stories to tell. It was a very interesting 1½ hours!

The rest of the evening consisted on a banquet in the Grand Ballroom, to which many of those in attendance wore fancy gowns; entertainment by Miss Vicki D'Salle and Her Combo, which was a rousing musical presentation; and a dance party in he Crown Room, which is on the 27th floor of the hotel. From the Crown Room, you can look through the large windows and see much of Atlanta down below!

It was a terrific experience! By the time I left for home on Sunday morning, smiling ear-to-ear had become habitual. Now that I am back at work, I am trying to break that habit — where it came from would be hard to explain!

[Julie M.]

When I was at the Be-All I met one of the organizers. She was as Virginia described as one of those girls who just didn't care about appearance. Anyway I asked about other conventions and when Southern Comfort came up she said, "It's getting TOO big!" From reading what you girls wrote, it seems she was right.

Next time maybe an excanhge of cell phone #s is in order

[DonnaT]

At the world carving championsips in Ocean City MD, when a group of carvers who chatted online decided to meet, one of the ladies put up a poster board with directions to the room we were to meet in and time. We even had "web" name tags to wear in case we ran into each other before hand.

[Virginia]

Julie, first I just love your picture! It shows such a pretty girl and the confidence just explodes off the page! Wonderful!
Yes the conference was large, but that is what draws the better speakers for the seminars and this year "we" will be working on corporate sponsors. Like everything else it comes down to money and as I pointed out how the Atlanta Gay Community raised money by going to the "entertainers" in their midst for help. Money helps make for better overall support in funding additonal items that make the whole conference even nicer. Just little things like sponsored coffee breaks between seminars or nicer displays, etc. Free make-up samples from various suppliers, maybe even more make-over artists from corporate sponsors. There are so many avenues that can open up with $$$$$.
Jamie Ann, honey you did a lot better job than I in an over view of the conference. I did go to Denae Doyle's seminars on "Feminine Movement"
Absolutely amazing - the things we take for granted???? Its no wonder that a lot of us are so easily read, not from appearance, but the moves and gesters we usually don't have a clue too. Some pointer:
Women are "puller" Men are "pushers" so watch you hand jesters.
Elbows slightly bent and kept close to your body.
Gentle, flowing, "pulling" hand movements.
Sitting and standing,
Men lead with their chin and/or head when walking - stand up straight
learn to rotate your shoulder not your entire upper body.
Gently tilting the head when listening and smile, smile, smile
Love,
Virginia

[Jamie Ann]

I agree completely with Virginia. The fact that the 2004 SCC had 450+ attendees is not a weakness. A conference that large can attract better speakers. It can deal with the hotel management for various perks, including rooms at a better rate. With 450 CDs roaming the hotel, the odds of other guests making life unpleasant for CDs is greatly reduced. The quality of the program, the quality of vendors, the room rates, the availability of shuttle buses to nightspots, and many other features make a conference of this size very desirable and better than smaller get togethers.

I am sorry that I did not hook up with others from this forum, but the advantages of a large, well organized conference still far outweigh the disadvantages. Speaking for myself, I had a terrific time, and I hope others will take advantage of this wonderful conference in the future.

[Beauty]

Hi there,

That was a great read. (the thread) I read every word of every post. This is the kind of account I needed to read about. I will seriously (for the first time) consider making my way there next year.

It sounds like you can live anonymously. Jamie and Virginia, your accounts of the events sounded so independent. I really like that. You were able to be independent and still be femme the entire time. I haven't ever really been worried about passing as much as I've been worried about being treated unkindly.

I totally applaud Virginia for not bringing any male/drabbe clothing. That's totally funny! That's what I call locking yourself into a commitment.

Thanks for everyone sharing about what the event or even events that are similar to this one and what you did and how you felt. It really, really helped me gain insight to going to an event. I did want my hair removal complete before I attended one of these events. So now that that's completed it's one less thing that keeps me from going.

Thanks again for writing about your experiences. I thought they were all quite excellent!!! I hope there is more to be honest.

You are all so wonderful!!

Beauty