the nature of an obsessive nature

Tea Cake · Post by **Tea Cake** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 4:35 pm

Hello!

I wonder if most CDers who have the pluck to follow up their interest in dressing are by nature rather-obsessive characters in all they do...

I often think that personality is expressed by different degrees of human-possibility

...that even though ultimately we are all VERY individual---there are some traits we share due to similar degrees of these possibilities.

So I'm curious if any here feel that they can at times feel possesed by a rather a strong degree of obsessive
behavior?

Sometimes this ability to focus is an awesome ally---othertimes I think learning to direct our focus in more diverse patterns would lead to achieving greater wholeness.

hmmmmmmm I wonder if these thoughts are easy to follow?-----------------------------------------------Tc

Love (SO) · Post by **Love (SO)** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 4:55 pm

Post by **DonnaT** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 5:52 pm

Not in all we do. With CDing, maybe a number of us.

Loretta Ann · Post by **Loretta Ann** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 7:26 pm

Responding to the statement;
I think learning to direct our focus in more diverse patterns would lead to achieving greater wholeness.

I concur with this statement. During my younger years as a cross-dresser, I was indeed compelled by a persistent disturbing preoccupation with an often unreasonable idea or feeling.

However I do not feel that is the situation today.

Great post.

Ginny · Post by **Ginny** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 10:04 pm

yes, I guess I am obsessive in most things I do.
The funny thing is, though, that of all the obsessions that have come and gone over the years, CDing is the most enduring.

Julie M. · Post by **Julie M.** » Fri Oct 08, 2004 12:32 am

My tendency is to dive headfirst into something and stick with it until I get bored. Not sure what you call that.

I do have one obsession that I never tire of and that's learning. I have to learn everything about anything that interests me. Sometimes it's exhausting.

My wife told me she didn't care what I thought but she thought my dressing is obsessive. I see it like a person who has been locked up for all her life and they finally escape. It's just natural to want to experience all freedom has to offer.

But then again I think she liked it when I was in my self-imposed jail.

SophieLawson · Post by **SophieLawson** » Fri Oct 08, 2004 7:26 am

Yes I am obsessive, everythign I do I do 100% like videogames, Formula One etc etc I basically live whatever it is I am enjoyying at that time. I wouldn't know it any other way, always been like this

I never thought about all of us being the same way. hmmmm

Sophie xx

Merinda · Post by **Merinda** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 5:02 am

I have an obsession with photography ,
being CDing or trains.
I have stopped all CD photography for the rest of this year to have a rest , I will probably go crazy with rail photography over the next months.

I think its good to have a break from any hobby or desire for a while , it gives you a clear view of what direction to take once you return.

Virginia · Post by **Virginia** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 8:26 am

Obsessive??
Interesting - yes to some degree. As I have said I have been "remodeling" and older home (now it appears that I may be moving into it) but that is another story, anyway, if I dress when I go there to work, I mean make-up, hair, mini-skirt , heels and do whatever, carpentery, plumbing, electrical, etc, not only do I seem to have an entirely different perspective but I seem to injure my self less, take my time more to make sure it is right and my color schemes seem more feminine and I like that - obsessive??? perhaps from a feminine perspective, anyway - I love it!!!!
Virginia

Julie M. · Post by **Julie M.** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 1:25 pm

Virginia wrote:if I dress when I go there to work, I mean make-up, hair, mini-skirt , heels and do whatever, carpentery, plumbing, electrical, etc, not only do I seem to have an entirely different perspective but I seem to injure my self less, take my time more to make sure it is right
Virginia

Girl, don't I know that feeling!

Elizabeth · Post by **Elizabeth** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 6:22 pm

Hi girls,

I have held off responding to this thread hoping it would just go away. I have so struggled with this. I have continually wondered if this whole crossdressing thing is nothing more than obesessive behavior. Having my wife to continual remind me over the years has helped keep in in the forefront of my mind. She always referred to it as obessive, and selfish.

I have tried to find defintionsof obsessive behavior, but it turns out that eating, bathing, mowing the lawn, all fit the definition. Indeed I am obsessed with keeping my house clean.

I don't know about all of this. I have felt obsessed to dress. And depressed when I had that feeling and could not. I just don't know how to know what an obsessive/compulsive behavior is. I mean all of mine seem normal? I guess everyone thinks that though.

Do I have obsessive behaviors? Well? When I decide to do something, it is as good as done. It is money in the bank. If I say something is going to happen, you can bet the farm it is going to happen. Does that make me obsessive or just determined? I don't know. Everything else that might be deemed obsessive about me, I would call human instinct, like eating, or my sex drive. I don't really drink, I quit smoking 12 years ago, I don't use drugs, and when I did, I was never addicted to anything.

If I was ever obsessed with anything, it was my wife. Letting go of her was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I was totally obsessed with her.

Love always,
Elizabeth

Loretta Ann · Post by **Loretta Ann** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 6:49 pm

Hi all,

I find it interesting to observe the direction this thread has taken.

Not many of the descriptions of obsessive behavior that I see in these posts fit the dictionary definition. How many of these would you describe as being compelled by a persistent disturbing preoccupation with an often unreasonable idea or feeling?

Are we avoiding the issue or speaking another language?

Elizabeth · Post by **Elizabeth** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 7:33 pm

Darlene,

I am clearly avoiding the issue. I need to understand what obsessive behavior is. My understanding that obsessions and compulsions go hand in hand.

I clearly don't understand the definition of this. Some enlightenment would be appreciated.

Love always,

Loretta Ann · Post by **Loretta Ann** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 9:11 pm

Elizabeth,

I believe that obsession is the force that compels one to go into action.

To give you an example from your own life.
Were you not obsessed with the persistent disturbing preoccupation and the unreasonable idea that you had to retain the marriage you were in, in order to feel secure? And did that not compel you do some things that contributed to a very unhappy life?

I further believe that for those of us who deem it necessary to educate all of society, that it is nothing more than an obsession. An unreasonable idea, as has been demonstrated here by the past and present divorces due to cross-dressing, in our community.compelling some of us to engage in some things that contribute to a very unhappy life?

Another obsession some have (and I used to have) is that it is possible to feel just like a woman feels. That is completely an unreasonable idea, being that surgery is not capable of such a task.

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?b ... on&x=0&y=0

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?b ... on&x=0&y=0

Some folks have said to me that they were their worst eneminy. I disagree I think that obsessions can be one of our worst enemies.

Hope this helps.

Candice · Post by **Candice** » Mon Oct 11, 2004 11:17 am

i'm obsessive in everything i do...its good to an extent, but messes me up alot...say if i have something to do, i can't even focus on it, till everything else is right, my surroundings have to be clean, any arguments have to be solved, everyone around me can't be fighting, which is all the time, so i usually wind up getting involved in other peoples troubles, trying to help them out, before and can even conquer my own...or i'll try to get away from everything and just go out somewhere and think, and i won't be able to think, because the only thing that is on my mind, is that i just left all that strife back there, and i need to go help.