I don't know how to start this so I'll just let my thoughts flow...just as the tears are now
Kersten, my heart goes out to you. It's hard enough to live a secret life but to also have an abusive father makes me respect your inner strength all the more.
Beauty and CJ, you're always there for those who are struggling and I want you to know how much that is appreciated. Thank you.
Elizabeth, we are kindred spirits. Nothing more need be said.
Lorna, your wit and wisdom is always inspirational. You always know how to lift my spirit.
As I sit here struggling to write this I realize this is a necessary part of healing, the crying and sadness. Maybe they are tears of joy to have such wonderful and caring friends. I thank you all. I'm sorry, I can't think straight now. I'll come back when I'm more composed.
Love,
Julie
A frighteningly emotional moment
Moderators: KimberlyS, CathyAnn
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Kersten Lee
- Miss Platinum Goddess
- Posts: 386
- Joined: Sun Feb 29, 2004 10:05 am
- Location: Central Nebraska
Everyone, Hi,
I am sorry that I brought you all down. I have never been a good original communicator. I mostly try to express my experiences that I may need comfort or that I try to comfort someone else. I have relayed a few good experiences even.
Since the time of that incident my toes and fingers have got cold and hurt when out in the cold. After the healing session, and understanding maybe for the first time of my inner strength, I am feeling quite good even with all the problems that surround me.
Julie, please understand, I wasn't trying to make you sad. I just told my story as it may possibly say something about you. I have carried all that hurt in my soul and have looked at myself as my dad treated me. The hurt for a lot of us has various sources. Misguided religious people, family, friends, strangers, associates and ourselves can cause us termoil, pain and unhappiness.
So many friends here have told me that I am strong and can survive what ever may come. I loved all of you for the heart felt support and the pain some of you have shared with me. Monday evening in therapy Linda gave me tangible proof. I am strong and against all odds I am here able to talk and share with all of you. By all rights, I should have been dead so many years ago.
Julie, by all you have shared with us, I know you have that strength inside your being. I just want you to know it is real. We all have struggles and life can hurt us a lot, but all our girl friends here have always been ready to lighten our load.
Kersten
PS I got my toes done in orange for Halloween. Ha! I had a wonderful time at the Salon visiting at length with three different wonderful woman.
Like coming here, my visits to the Salon renew my faith in humanity!
I am sorry that I brought you all down. I have never been a good original communicator. I mostly try to express my experiences that I may need comfort or that I try to comfort someone else. I have relayed a few good experiences even.
Since the time of that incident my toes and fingers have got cold and hurt when out in the cold. After the healing session, and understanding maybe for the first time of my inner strength, I am feeling quite good even with all the problems that surround me.
Julie, please understand, I wasn't trying to make you sad. I just told my story as it may possibly say something about you. I have carried all that hurt in my soul and have looked at myself as my dad treated me. The hurt for a lot of us has various sources. Misguided religious people, family, friends, strangers, associates and ourselves can cause us termoil, pain and unhappiness.
So many friends here have told me that I am strong and can survive what ever may come. I loved all of you for the heart felt support and the pain some of you have shared with me. Monday evening in therapy Linda gave me tangible proof. I am strong and against all odds I am here able to talk and share with all of you. By all rights, I should have been dead so many years ago.
Julie, by all you have shared with us, I know you have that strength inside your being. I just want you to know it is real. We all have struggles and life can hurt us a lot, but all our girl friends here have always been ready to lighten our load.
Kersten
PS I got my toes done in orange for Halloween. Ha! I had a wonderful time at the Salon visiting at length with three different wonderful woman.
Like coming here, my visits to the Salon renew my faith in humanity!
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Virginia
- Goddess of the Universe
- Posts: 5543
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 4:06 pm
- Location: Strange Magic Hill
Ok, you girls are going to put me back in therapy!!!!! I will be brief, I guess the fact that my mother died an alcoholic and was divorced from my father before I was born (yeah I are one!) and my grandparents put me in military school from age 4 until I graduated, I was, shall I say somewhat, hell I was totally self-sufficient, eat or be eaten, the hell with women and children first it was every "man" for himself. I thought and still think, when I see some of the idiots around me, I turned out all right! I have been a crossdresser I guess, all my life, but like a lot of you did not have a clue what was going on until "later in life."
Where I seem to differ with a lot of my sisters here is that I does not seem to bother me as much, if at all!! I love what it does for me, on the other hand I had what I consider 27 years of a great marriage, and now that is over and she (my SO) says it is not to do with my CD'ing, but ... well I don't know and the truth be know - I don't care anymore! I enjoy Virginia, she comforts me and we get along great!!
I do get very emotional now - not that I did not in the past, but I, like a lot of you, kept it inside (real men don't cry!) Now when I read some of the posts here, I end up bawling like a baby!!!! I love it. But as for my own emotional status I guess that is where I seem to part company with a lot of my sisters here, Julie! I am me/Virginia, that's is the way it is - I deal with it and move on. No emotional hang-ups, no purging, no regrets! I know for those that have children a home - yeah it is a problem, but when I compare "apples to apples" I must reiterate, I am me I like me I like Virginia so "first star to the right and straight on 'till mornin!"
I love you girls more that you will ever know and the last thing that I would want to do is offend any of you, but I am who I am I do get emotional now and I let it out in tears when I feel it but then I more on , I will not dwell on it. It's just me!
Love you all,
Virginia
Where I seem to differ with a lot of my sisters here is that I does not seem to bother me as much, if at all!! I love what it does for me, on the other hand I had what I consider 27 years of a great marriage, and now that is over and she (my SO) says it is not to do with my CD'ing, but ... well I don't know and the truth be know - I don't care anymore! I enjoy Virginia, she comforts me and we get along great!!
I do get very emotional now - not that I did not in the past, but I, like a lot of you, kept it inside (real men don't cry!) Now when I read some of the posts here, I end up bawling like a baby!!!! I love it. But as for my own emotional status I guess that is where I seem to part company with a lot of my sisters here, Julie! I am me/Virginia, that's is the way it is - I deal with it and move on. No emotional hang-ups, no purging, no regrets! I know for those that have children a home - yeah it is a problem, but when I compare "apples to apples" I must reiterate, I am me I like me I like Virginia so "first star to the right and straight on 'till mornin!"
I love you girls more that you will ever know and the last thing that I would want to do is offend any of you, but I am who I am I do get emotional now and I let it out in tears when I feel it but then I more on , I will not dwell on it. It's just me!
Love you all,
Virginia
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!