Getting "Ma'amed" Anyway

[RikkiOfLA]

Hi,

Recently I had the experience of stepping out the front door for a moment without my makeup on, and getting greeted as "ma'am" by someone passing by.

Has this ever happened to you--being called "miss" or "ma'am" even when you weren't trying to be en femme?

Anyway, now I'm realizing that maybe I don't have to wear makeup (the all-over face paint--beard cover, concealer, foundation, and powder) except for special occasions. I know my skin would like that; it's healthy for skin to be able to breathe, and not get its pores clogged up with all that junk.

You may be wondering how I can get away with this--don't I have beard shadow? Yes I do, but my facial hair has grayed to an incredible warm gray shade--it's not too far from my skin color! My head hair I have to dye to a more youthful brown. My eyebrows and lashes get mascara to bring them to the same color as my head hair.

So last night I tried it--I went out to see some friends in a casual setting. I went without makeup. It felt naked! But it worked fine.

[Joanna_S]

Hi Rikki !

That must´ve felt wonderful! Do you mean that you weren´t dressed as a woman but they treated you as one anyway? Personally I don´t have the guts to go out dressed but my face has some female features, small chin, shaped eyebrows and at least in my opinion I look a bit female. Maybe my beard shadow gets less obvious when I get older. No hope of that for the next 10 years

Joanna

[RikkiOfLA]

Hi Joanna,

Sorry, I should have been clearer. When I stepped out the front door, I was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt--the kind of casual androgynous stuff that both men and women wear. My longish hair and shaped eyebrows conspire with the shape of my face, I guess.

It was a nice feeling to be ma'amed without really trying!

[Beauty]

Hi Rikki,

When my hair was long I did get ma'amd and I was 100% in en drabbe.

That's really great that you had that experience. I expect it's going to happen a lot more.

Beauty

[Violet]

A few times I've had people try to get my attention by calling me 'miss'. Esp. if approaching from behind as I often wear women's pants & coats, wear my hair long & take somewhat better care of it than most other Gboys my age do. I must admit it always startles me.

[Merinda]

It used to happen to me a lot when my hair was long , my wife and I were refered to as " ladies " or " you ladies " commonly in shopping centres.

[Ahzz]

I get called "miss" about once every 2 weeks or so. Usually at a store by one of the staff that saw me from behind, or the side.
Soon as they hear me answer, or they see me with a moustache and goatee, they get all embarrased. heh. I just tell them "no big deal".

*grin*

[PaulaK]

I've been Ma'am-ed twice while not trying to pass. Both times, I was addressed by salesgirls in K-Mart. Each time I was wearing jeans, a golf shirt and cowboy boots. Once it happened when I was in the Sporting Goods Department! I was surprised and pleased each time and hesitated to speak to break the spell.

[Kristen]

Never had been mam'ed in person while in drab, but over the phone constantly. such a fem voice. I have been irriated and pleased at the same time. Kristen

[Anita]

Hi Rikki--
It has happened to me twice, and both times baffled me. I'm not at all femme-looking without makeup and clothing cues, and my hair was not that long at the time. Both times the clerks did it as an automatic response, and both times they seemed embarrassed at their mistake.

They looked down, and did not smile the way they usually would if I were standing there, enfemme, and they had "ma'amed" me.

Your post and Maggie's post about changed facial expression bring up an old point: is Anita someone different than I am? Some feel no different dressed, others do. For me, Anita brings a different appearance to my face, and maybe even my body.

So I suppose she was coming through without any of the usual cues on those days.