Celes

[Terri(SO)]

Well, I was beginning to worry about Celes because we had not heard from her in so long. (For new folks, Celes is one of our own who is currently deployed in Iraq.) I sent a message first through Carolynn (thank you again) and then directly. Here is an exerpt from the response.

"Umm... wear do I start... Iraq isn't THAT bad, at least not for me and tnot this instant. I've been spending most of my days in an air conditioned trailer playing my guitar, reading the word, playing video games, and excersicing whenever I feel like I'm wasting my time playing video games. I've not been on a convoy in about a week now, and I must say that the free time that I've been having due to the lack of army stuff to do is quite refreshing. It's just the same as being on a four day pass, except I can't trick drunk guys into buying my beer tickets for insane amounts of money (I'm not a big drinker)...

However, there is a cause for concern because I have had problems with gender issues. I could get on the board, but I really don't relate to a lot of the people on there, because they talk about how pretty they are while en femme, and I just don't understand it, because CDing is something totally different for me. It's not about being pretty or "passing", but more about just being a woman. I thought that it was just about clothing, and that I was "just a crossdresser", but that does not seem to be the case. It feels like its more about being a woman, and not just looking like one (women are SO much more than just eye candy, and I wish that more people would learn that). I don't even want to be the type thats all into being the whole fasion mag glamour diva queen. I just want to be a woman and I don't know how to explain it. I had a dream one morning a few days back that I feel was God's way of telling me "Look, Nick, I made you a man, and I have a plan for you as a man." ... but I don't know if that is something that I can accept. I've been going through a lot of crap in my head (and none of it has to do with being here), and I just want to find comfort in solace in who God made me as opposed to my rebellion against Him."

I think its good to hear from folks at home so maybe you can send your own thoughts and support that way too.

[Beauty]

Hi Terri,

Thanks for posting. I guess when you spot read the forum you can find anything you want to find, but I'm sure when she gets back she'll see there's a wide variety of posts, ranging from what she described to what happened in a thread today, "Will a guy in a dress ever be accepted?"

I'm just glad she's safe and I'm glad you posted what she had to say thanks!

Beauty

[Tristen Cox]

Thanks Terri, I had wondered what had happened since I've not seen word since she left for Iraq. And I think she's right about women, I would rather be one myself than worry about what I look like dressed(there is more than clothes to being female). At least things are going well for her so far over there. Hopefully that won't change and the issues with gender won't create any problems until she can get back to solve them on her own time. I wish her well.

Love
Tristen

[Lorna]

Hi Terri, thanks for posting this.

I honestly cried when I first heard about Terri's deployment to Iraq. But I am so relieve to hear that she's doing okay! I really hope that she comes home soon.