Why do you purge?

CJ · Post by CJ » Wed Jun 01, 2005 8:09 pm

Hi all,

A simple question that I realize admits of no simple answer. Why do you purge? Here, I'll assume that purging and ceasing all crossdressing activities are not the same thing (or are they?).

Although I haven't dressed (fully) for more than five months now, I have no intention of purging. Heck! I haven't purged in close to six years (and, yes, my closet and dresser drawers are practically bursting with silks and frills).

I tend to stop CD'ing when I'm feeling blue. This past winter was no exception. Purging is another matter, however. Last time I purged was for the simple (and eminently practical) reason that I was moving. I just didn't feel like moving all that stuff across the country. To be honest, I purged most of my male wardrobe as well, at the time.

So. Why do you purge?

Love,
CJ

Loretta Ann · Post by **Loretta Ann** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 8:13 pm

Hi CJ,

I don't (any more) and have no intention of doing so.

If you were to change the question to why have you purged (in the past) I would be able to contribute.

Connie · Post by **Connie** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 9:18 pm

I've only purged once, and that was about 20 years ago. I don't count getting rid of stuff that is damaged, doesn't fit or just "isn't me"

Allena · Post by **Allena** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 9:47 pm

WOWzers!
5 votes and the vast majority are for 'none of the above reasons'!

Perhaps it's the 'why do you purge' instead of 'why have you purged'?

I have purged for several of the reasons listed.

The last time was when I sold off several items here.
I wasn't thinking it as a purge...heck...I probably denied it!
Liar liar pants on fire!

THIS time, I promise to NEVER, EVER, purge again!

HONESTLY! I'm really pretty sure about this...

As I've gotten older, my purges have cost me more!

This is especially true because I never used to go out and BUY stuff, and I didn't have the internet to help me either.

"How did he acquire his lovely stuff 'back then' if he didn't buy it?" they ask.

Well, I didn't steal it, but I did have my ways...bwaahaahaahaa

I now have a hanging bag...for hanging stuff, and a suitcase for the folding/wad-it-up stuff.

My wife knows about it, accepts it as part of my life, even tolerates seeing me in some of the 'border-line' stuff.
So hopefully now I honestly won't have to purge ever again.

Thanks for the poll!
I'm enjoying these surveys you all are putting up.

Beauty · Post by **Beauty** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 4:29 am

Hi CJ,

Great poll. I'm with you regarding the last time I dressed all the way and the fact that I haven't purged in I think over 10 years, maybe longer?

I voted for several of the above.

Beauty

Merinda · Post by **Merinda** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 5:22 am

The last time I fully purged was July 2001

Post by **Celia** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 2:05 pm

I chose unavailable privacy. If I'm in extremely close quarters with people I can't afford to be out with, the clothing has to be gone (or somewhere else, at best).

-Celia

Jabbela · Post by **Jabbela** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 5:29 pm

Hi,
really a great poll, but you forgot to add a "I have never purged and will not do so in the future" option.
Of course there were times, when I thought about purging - but this was a long time ago, and I never did it. Even I was completely in closet for the past, I managed that no one found out - except once, when my wive caught me dressed.
At the time when I thought about purging, I more thought about stopping CDing at all - which never worked (even my urge to CD was very low at that time). But even when I had tried to stop it - I would not purge my stuff - mostly as I have a lot of memories attached to them. So I never threw an item to dump - except it is worn out.

Sonja · Post by **Sonja** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 2:06 am

I purged once a long time ago, but have no intentions of ever doing it again.

Thanks,

Sonja

CJ · Post by CJ » Fri Jun 03, 2005 9:12 pm

Hi all,

Thanks for the interesting replies!

Jabbela, the reason I didn't want to include a "no purge" option is because I'm curious to find out what the reasons are that those of you who have never purged have never done so. Sometimes, the "urge to purge" can be as overwhelming as the urge to crossdress itself. It's a wonder to me that not more of us have done so.

My only "true" purge (as an adult) occured in 1996. I got rid of everything. Even a "scrapbook" I'd been keeping in which I'd clipped and pasted fascinating articles and stories about crossdressing (which I still referred to as 'transvestism' back then). This included a full-page photo of me (as Christina) that was the back cover of Transvestite Connection, a now-defunct Canadian magazine (mostly personals and a few articles and stories). I purged for a number of reasons, the main one being that I wanted to focus on my "spiritual" development (such as it was). Today, I fully realize and understand that spirituality and transgender identities are absolutely not incompatible. It took me a while to come to see this, though.

Man, I rue the day I put that plastic garbage bag in the alley (I can still see the heels poking holes near the bottom of the bag). Oh well. I learned my lesson.

I guess there are two reasons I no longer submit to the urge to purge (not that it comes very often anymore): 1) I'm a bit of a collector, and my female wardrobe is just another collection to me, I think, and, 2) I've invested too much moolah in all those clothes and shoes to just blithely throw them away now.

I still do get rid of stuff on occasion but, like Connie, I do it because the clothing doesn't suit me or is damaged. Otherwise, "the skirt stays in the picture."

Love,
CJ

Jadeanne · Post by **Jadeanne** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 9:55 pm

Hi all,

Nice topic, CJ.

I count myself among the never purged.

When I was an only child still living at home I had only my mother's clothing to dress in. She kept clothing until it was literally worn out and then used them as cleaning rags.

After I restarted dressing 3 years ago, my loving, supporting wife wears sizes for everything except shoes that I can fit into, and gives me permission to borrow almost everything. She borrows some of my dresses, tops, and skirts. She doesn't care for a lot of my underfashions, but I have my own lingerie chest.

I don't think I would ever purge. If for some reason I wanted to stop crossdressing, I would pack and store the items she doesn't care to wear.

Jadeanne

Aeryn · Post by **Aeryn** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 8:06 am

I noted "several of the above" but have a reason not noted. I have purged a couple of times in my life. The first few were guilt/angst but one was because I simply wasn't interested in dressing anymore.

Just as an aside, when my SO found out, I would have purged (not that I had much) out of guilt/shame etc. but she told me not to. So it is all stored away in the basement for now.

Jaye · Post by **Jaye** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 9:08 pm

My first purge was in 1997, at the urging of my wife. I was allowed to keep a small wardrobe for "special" occasions. In 1999, after we moved to Charlotte, she demanded another purge of me, and aside from panties and hose (which I wear all the time anyway) all of my wardrobe went out in the garbage. I bagged it all up myself, and committed them to the dumpster myself. I begged with her to let me at least donate them to Goodwill or some other thrift store, but she insisted that they go into the trash. I made it almost two years before buying anything for myself other than a nightshirt she said was "cute". Never again, I vowed.

Now, I am in the process of getting rid of a few things, but it is because I want to. When my wife left in August 2003, I began a little buying spree at thrift stores and cheap discount stores. I didn't buy with an eye towards practicality, or any long-term value. I bought stuff that didn't fit well, or that didn't look good, or whatever, just to have the stuff after so long. Now, nearly two years later, I am beginning to put together a real wardrobe. I have outfits made up of specific items that look good together. I have items that are interchangeable - a blouse that looks good with this skirt or those jeans, for example. I'm learning to accessorize. Out of my purchases of the last couple of weeks, I've managed to put together two different outfits, one casual and another a little dressy, with shoes and accessories to match (well, almost - the casual outift needs a nice pair of boots that I haven't found yet).

This current purge is more to clear space in my closet than anything else.

Post by **DonnaT** » Sun Jun 05, 2005 2:23 pm

I've never purged. I've got rid of a few things that I couldn't wear anymore, however, but now that I've lost weight wish I hadn't. I've even got high heeled wedge shoes almost 29 years old

Merinda · Post by **Merinda** » Sun Jun 05, 2005 3:29 pm

As I said above I haven't FULLY purged since july 2001

However I have got rid of stuff to make room for new stuff.
One or more of the following reasons will apply in the decision-

(1) item damaged or worn out

(2) item gathering dust , never worn , probably never will

(3) item doesnt fit properly

(4) item looks totally ridiculous on me when I put it on

(5) item is many years out of fashion

Any items that fall into catagories 1 , 3 or 5 that have sentimental history will be held in storage.