Finding support outside the home

[Allena]

I am trying to find out where our local GLBT group meetings are in this county. I was in contact with someone before and I'll try there again.

My questions for you all are these...

Do you attend, or have you ever, attended a support group meeting?

Was it specifically for CD's, or other 'unique folks'?

What was the reason(s) that took you there?

How did you discover the group/meetings?

Did you find support and/or like-minded folks there?

Do you attend DRAB or DRAG?

Thanks for your answers.
I'm just curious because I'm finally seeking out support for myself away from the home and computer (I won't leave this place though...just want to add to my resources).

[Beauty]

Hi Allen,

These are great questions. I think Virginia just posted about her experiences with GLBT groups.

Yes, I have attended support meetings. It was pretty weird at first.

My meeting was specifically for TG'd folks, but SOs were welcome too.

The reason I was there was because I finally wanted to get out and meet others again who were like me, but unlike when I was in my 20s I wanted to go dressed.

Yes, I found much support there and like minded thinking people there. I went for quite a while, but when my membership lapsed I didn't renew this year.

I am happy to announce that every meeting I attended I was dressed en femme. I tend to save my drag dressing for my headlining shows in Vegas.

Others did show up and weren't dressed. No one batted an eye at them.

I think you'll be able to find something that will allow you to get out there and get the support you deserve. Good luck Allen!

Beauty

[Cathy L. Anderson]

I am trying to find out where our local GLBT group meetings are in this county.

> Do you attend, or have you ever, attended a support group meeting?

Yes, in several cities where I've lived or visited. I have't had much success with groups sponsored by local GLBT centers, because there the emphasis often seems much more GL than BT.

> Was it specifically for CD's, or other 'unique folks'?

Some of both.

> What was the reason(s) that took you there?

Wanted a chance to dress, to be out as Cathy, to make friends.

> How did you discover the group/meetings?

From the directory of TG/CD support groups in the back of the magazine, Transgender Tapestry. Maybe that information is now on the IFGE website ( http://www.ifge.org ). I've also learned of groups by inquiring at local CD transformation boutiques.

> Did you find support and/or like-minded folks there?

I'm not sure I was looking for "support" per se. But I did find it a satisfactory outlet and opportunity to relate to people as Cathy. I found
the people in these groups positive and helpful as a rule.

> Do you attend DRAB or DRAG?

Usually dressed as a girl. Sometimes I've brought my femme clothes with me and first checked the place out dressed as a boy, then changed.

Cheers,

Cathy

[Virginia]

Allen,
I know we are all different in how we accept our "gift." But I would recommend that unless you are in a big city and are not easily intimidated, go to the meeting - first time en drab. Kind of get a feel for the people there and at the appropriate time interject that you are a crossdresser and be firm about it. it is nothing to be ashamed of so stand up not only for yourself, but remember you are our ambassador. I was told by my TS friend that I went kind of overboard and appeared to be somewhat militant with my statements, but that is just me. Iwnated them to have no doubt that I was there to support their organization if they wanted, but I would not take any crap and if they did not want me there, it would not hurt my feelings as I was aware of the history between, "us" and "them."
Be firm in your position, but diplomatic.
Good luck and seek out a group to get involved in,
Virginia

[Allena]

Thank you all very much for your answers.

Anyone else?

Virginia,
I'll try and get you a plane ticket and the date, time and place for my first meeting so you can 'back me up' !

Gee, you're militant!



I'm waiting to hear back from a couple of folks.
Seeing as how this is the summer break, I think some of the resources are out until school starts again.
It seems as though the actual group I was looking for was linked to the local university.

I may check out other locations in Oregon or California, along the coast or close to it.

I've been thinking about going to one of those BIG affairs like the one in Arkansas.
I'm not sure how much 'support' I would find at these places, but I hear they are great fun!

[CJ]

Hi all,

Allen,

No, unfortunately, I've never been to support group meetings of any kind. I'm not sure why not. Maybe it has to do with my personality; I'm a bit of loner and have always been so. I'm sociable enough, though not necessarily very "social." I've always been more comfortable in small groups (four or five people at most). Heck, even attending the annual Christmas party at work requires more energy than I've got!

To be frank, Montreal doesn't have much of a "support group scene." I think Toronto, in the neighbouring province of Ontario, would be a better bet for me if I ever did want to go to such a meeting.

Good luck on your own path, Allen!

Love,
CJ

[Anita]

Do you attend, or have you ever, attended a support group meeting?

When I first discovered I was going to deal with dressing, I went to one. I went three times dressed as a guy, and then decided I wouldn't go back until I had bought the clothes and actually started dressing.

Was it specifically for CD's, or other 'unique folks'?

It was very transsexual focused.

What was the reason(s) that took you there?

I had no idea where these feelings were coming from. For all I knew, it meant that I was going to schedule surgery the next week! I just didn't know much about it. I knew that I now wanted to go out dressed, and that didn't fit what little I knew of crossdressing. Like most of the public, I'd never heard of or seen a CD dressed out in public. So I jumped to the assumption that I might be a full-blown TS. It scared me, and I wanted to know what was happening to me!

How did you discover the group/meetings?

I knew they were there at the local GLBT center, and I looked them up.

Did you find support and/or like-minded folks there?

The group was 95% transsexual. I found acceptance there, but not so much like-mindedness. After I had been going awhile, though, I found I had more in common with the women there.

Do you attend DRAB or DRAG?

It was OK to be there in drab, but after three meetings it put a limit on me. It put a barrier up to getting to know people. I didn't go back until I had bought all the clothes and accessories. It put me on the same page as the others, and they began to respond more to me. Besides, I couldn't experience a lot of what they talked about until I had dressed for myself. I had not ever fully dressed, before that time.

I'm just curious because I'm finally seeking out support for myself away from the home and computer (I won't leave this place though...just want to add to my resources).

Face-to-face contact is different from here, and is a good addition to it. You can pick up a lot of support just by watching other CDs, and how they handle themselves.

[Allena]

Thank you CJ!
I always thought Montreal would be a great place for a CD'er to live!
I'm getting an education on Montreal from reading your posts.
Thanks for the education!

Anita, thank you for the information!
I travel to San Francisco and a bit farther South to visit family/in-laws.
Perhaps I should look for a meeting to 'drop in' on, if that would not be too rude.

I believe there is a Tri-Ess chapter in Brookings, Oregon.
I may even try that.