How did I start you ask?

Darth_Wolfenbarg · Post by **Darth_Wolfenbarg** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 2:02 am

Well I like many other kids had some things put on in younger days, but the true feeling that you get didn't come until I was 10. That day I took fancy to a pair of some really sexy shoes. They were high heels, very nice and they fit so well for someone my age. Well at the time I was supposed to watch some Spanish channels on TV and get the time recorded by a parent for points. That was some annoying time, because for the most part all I could watch was the news, and they talked too fast for me to pick up anything at all. But from what I did see, for a local channel the news was outstanding, stuff from all over the world and none of it was biased, showed both sides and whatnot....where was I?

Well I was sitting there bored until I eyeballed a really sexy pair of high heels in my mom's closet. (the TV was in the parents room, my dad was watching something else in the Living room) I looked back to the TV but all I could think about was those shoes. I just kept thinking about them until I found myself walking over and trying them on. I was surprised, but they fit me perfectly. I heard somebody coming not long after so I hopped onto the bed and covered up with a blanket. I wasn't very smooth, but I played it off well enough for my bro not to care to notice anything. When he left I felt thrilled. I started posing in front of this mirror in the room and just staring at those shoes. So I figured that nobody ever wore them, because all the other sizes in the closet were a bit bigger than this pair. So without even taking them off I walked back to my room unnoticed and put them away in a dresser of mine.

One day my bro found out about this and started blackmailing me to do insane things for him or he would tell my mom. This had become tedious over time so I told him that I didn't care anymore. He just walked out and told my mom right there. He lost, she just laughed and told me stories in his face about how he said as a kid that he wanted nothing but girl clothes. I had to put the shoes back however. So I was basically 'purging' for all this time since I just wanted those shoes back. I was doing this for about a year until my mom finished college and started grad school. We live in CO Springs, and her school was in Boulder and sometimes she went to Denver. Since she couldn't commute every day she got an appartment and then started to stay all week there and then come back home for the weekends. My brother was always off with friends and my dad works during the day. My time had finally come. It kind of got me mad when I saw that those shoes no longer fit.

Next day I was pondering the rest of the shoes in the closet and decided to try some of those. I found all kinds and was trying on them all. Then I thought of something else, why just shoes? So I started to look around, I didn't care for outfits yet, I just wanted something I could wear all the time. So I opened up a drawer and pulled out bras and panties. I would wear the panties all day long, and actually went without my own underwear for almost a year. I would wear the bras at night and just sleep with nothing but bras and panties. I would get this great feeling, like I was another one of the girls. Then once again the 'Why just this?' mode came back. So I started wearing entire outfits, all the time. For a long period of time I couldn't go a day without. By this time I was 12. I was about half way through my 6th grade year. I was quite good with this by now, I was always wearing tank tops, and swishy skirts and always in high heels. Even today the shoes remain my favorite.

I stepped it up quite a lot when my brother started 9th grade. He was always at his Saber Team practices for ROTC so I would be able to spend hours after school dressing up and waltzing around the house and on the computer playing games or chatting on the net. I didn't go a single day for 6 months without dressing up, and I never got caught. Since that little shoe thing I have still never been caught. So it was at this point that I started applying make-up, lipstick, mascara and whatnot to my face. I was quite amatuer but because of my age I passed quite easily. That summer it was horrible. Me and my bro were grounded. I was grounded for focusing on my looks at home more than homework, and my bro for just doing terribly because he was getting lazy. So we were at home all day, and I couldn't change out into anything at all. No more nighties or just bras and panties to sleep at night, because he would come in and wake me up all the time. So I would get caught if I did. So I had to stop for like 2 months and even then not much. I focused on school the begining of that year and got all restrictions lifted.

That year of 8th was quite odd. I was always more cautious and that over caution caused me to be caught by someone, but it was quite humourous. See I was fixing a curtain to make sure it wouldn't fall like it always does. I was dressed up though, completely and fully. I was toying with it and it fell off and my neighbor was right there watching me. I was stunned, he knew this house had two sons. But instead of think, he thought I had broken in and was someone completely different. So the cops came by and I told them nothing happened while back to normal.

I was cut off quite a lot this past year, but mostly of my own choice. Instead of staying home while my bro was at ROTC practices and meetings, I joined ROTC and joined the armed drill team. We toss and spin rifles among other crazy things, it's good fun. But in the team I impressed one girl quite a lot. Her name was Sheryl, a lot of time chatting and getting to know and then bam, I have a girlfriend. She was really special to me, so I told her all about what I do. She didn't have a crazy reaction at all, she almost immediatlely embraced it. We were quite happy too, whenever she came or I visited when we were alone I was dressed up. It felt so great to be around someone else in this mode. Heck, she even bought me some things so it's not awkward going to the store. But of all the things she bought me, she got me this really nice, sexy, and a tad pricey pair of shoes. I still wear them all the time. We would take picture all of the time. Then some really crazy stuff went down and we are now apart. Too bad, I miss that...

Well it may have been more than a begining, but hey, I'm just out there.

Beauty · Post by **Beauty** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 3:55 am

Hey Darth,

For me the best beginnings story is a long one.

I love to read them and yours was great. The part about something catching our eye sounds so similar to a lot of the beginnings stories it's great!

Yours was the first I'd heard about it being shoes.

Reading your post reminded me of when I was younger. I started dressing in my mom's things in kindergarten. That lasted up until I was about 9 or 10. Then I started getting bolder. By the time I was 11, I was dressing fully every time my parents left the house. My brother was always out so much when I was 11 and up that it was at least once a week that I was wearing something en femme. We didn't ever have a baby sitter, so I was free to dress the moment I heard the garage door close.

We had a pretty cool privacy fence and our house was a pretty good size so I felt like I always had plenty of room.

It seems to me that you really have a feel for what feels good to you and I think that's super.

As a boy you'll want to do boy things too and I hope you remember that's ok too. It seems you already know that already, but I'm writing that for the days to come when you think, "I don't need this anymore." You're right if you ever think this thought. You don't need to, you just want to.

As you move into adulthood you'll find that time to dress will become much harder. My best years were from 14-18. I dressed every week, fully, and it was usually more than once a week. When I left home things changed and I didn't have my mom's wardrobe anymore so things became more difficult. Since this wasn't something I thought I'd do forever I got in to karate movies, and more masculine things, and of course.. THE LADIES!!!

I think I've adjusted ok and all, it's just that I think I put more into being a boy (it's meaning) than I needed to. I was just displaying my dualistic nature when I dressed as a gal. I thought it was totally sexual only. I thought it was just me being attracted to females and I could easily create a passable gal in the mirror and couldn't find a date. Sheesh, there's more to it than that. I'm just trying to say you should continue to move along like you're doing now. Accept it and don't read too much into it. You are who you are.

Thanks again for the fabulous beginnings story. It was great!

Beauty

Darth_Wolfenbarg · Post by **Darth_Wolfenbarg** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 4:05 am

Thank you much. Am I really the only story that you've read that started with shoes? Crazy, I thought that would be a big one.

Writing that was really hard. Not that it was hard to be personal, but my brother kept coming in so I had to copy and paste then close the window as fast as I could. It worked though.

Even though it has been a little more than a day I have a lot more confidence since posting here. I will be alone for the next two days and am going to go out. I'm already shaking in anticipation, going to the mall with a friend. She said yes, she said she could use the laugh. So could I. Sometimes I think my tone is too comical.

Beauty · Post by **Beauty** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 5:55 am

Hi Darth,

Good luck at the mall. Please, please, please be safe.

Yes, you're the first story, I think? that I've read about heels, but as you can see there are a lot.

At least I can say you're the first that really stood out to me, if there are more.

Beauty

Becca · Post by **Becca** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 6:00 am

Even though I haven't yet posted a beginning story. Which I plan to!
Mine actually started with shoes. I started with my mums shoes and then my sisters when I was about 5. I saw my mum walking out the house in these pair of business-like heels. I was wondering why anyone would add a couple of centimetres to their feet. Being quite curious I found myself trying them on to see how tall I was. I found some lovely black sandals with about a 3" heel i think. And I remember sitting there thinking how good I looked in them. I soon found the pleasure of other clothes. But shoes remain the most important part of my outfit today. Without the right shoes, the outfit will look terrible.

Hugs and kisses,

Becca xxx

Btw.. Great story, proves your not the only one!

Post by **DonnaT** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 7:02 am

Nice story Darth.

Be careful at the mall. Keep a pair of eyes in the back of your head (watch your back).

Strange that I don't remeber wearing my mom's shoes when I dressed fully. I know I must have though, I've small feet. I like heels now though

Connie · Post by **Connie** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 9:59 pm

Hi Darth

I enjoyed reading your story, especially as I too first focused on my mom's shoes, unfortunately, I don't think I could ever wear them.

You have an enviable opportunity here as many of us have to think back quite a few years to remember how we started dressing. You, though, have the opportunity to write about it as it is happening! Very cool.

Please keep us up to date here or elsewhere on the forum, it will keep all of us young.

Connie

Darth_Wolfenbarg · Post by **Darth_Wolfenbarg** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 12:54 am

Well I went. It was quite an odd experience, not just from happening, because I it one. I told my friend that I was going to do this, though none of my friends really know that I'm into this. So when they heard, they thought this was going to be me in a public place being an idiot. Well after a couple of hours they were right.

I met up with my friends, though I was surprised to see more than one, but that turned out alright anyway. Went to a couple of stores, then went outside where the oddness and the jokes began. Now while my friends couldn't breathe from how much they were laughing, the odd and slightly idiotic things I did made passers by laugh as well. At one point a cop came by, because hopping on a friends back and riding around the parking lot is a disturbance. He didn't notice that I was a guy though, and after they left after telling us to tone it down, we also left.

Odd but still fun.

Beauty · Post by **Beauty** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 2:39 am

Hi Darth,

I'm glad you are safe. It sounds like you had a pleasant outing. As the days go on you'll look back on this with fonder and fonder memories.

Congrats!!!

Beauty

Darth_Wolfenbarg · Post by **Darth_Wolfenbarg** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 3:34 am

I think I could also do halloween. Last year my friend Rob went as a Hooker. Maybe I should do the same. Haha...

Post by **DonnaT** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 7:05 am

I don't really want to put a backward spin on your outing Darth, but how did you really feel, inside, in response to being laughed at? Knowing that your friends see crossdressing as a joke?

Darth_Wolfenbarg · Post by **Darth_Wolfenbarg** » Sat Jul 23, 2005 12:44 am

Well it turned out how I made it to be. I guess there is some choice for this. Then again I do have some measure of influence over a lot of people. I'm more 'important' because I make people laugh.

Darth_Wolfenbarg · Post by **Darth_Wolfenbarg** » Mon Jul 25, 2005 2:26 am

*sigh*

I don't know why, but dressing is bringing more stress now than it used to relieve. Prolly to close to getting caught so often...it's showing too. I'm breaking out like crazy....I'll put it aside for a while.