Buying female clothing

[Sallee]

I have never had a problem buying female clothing endrab or when dressed. I find it more interesting to buy it endrab just to see if I get a comment. I have had some interesting comments when buying bras and other assorted lingerie. My comment occasionally has been yes they are for me. I kind of welcome the comments. I don't know the clerks so why should I care. Once I did run into boss when in drab and I had a handful of clothing. HIs comment was shopping for your daughters I lied and agreed. ...Sallee

[Virginia]

You know the old adage, Sallee: "When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping."
I think I will hit the Goodwill again this morning, I have not found a nice blouse in a while!
Good hunting!
Virginia

[DonnaT]

I've never had a problem shopping for ladies clothes endrab either. Not had the opportunity enfemme, however.

I can think of only one time getting a comment, and that was at a grocery store buying pantyhose. She asked if I thought they'd fit and simply replied I hope so. No question was raised about who they were for.

[Paulie]

I'm right there with Donna....

I've bought so many clothes endrab, that now I don't even give it a second thought. Most clerks don't really pay much attention, but some have commented on how pretty an item is. I have had a few that I suspect knew I was buying for myself, but they never came out and asked me point blank. Guess I'm not real sure how I would reply... like most things, I'll know when it occurs! LOL
Paulie

[Beauty]

Hi,

This is another hurdle where I've stopped on the track of life and just cried in front of it. I hope to get over it one day, but I really move slowly when making changes (believe it or not) and right now I just can't convince myself it's ok to do.

Thank you all for posting about how brave you are and you doing it. I doubt you think you're all that brave, but I really, really do.

Beauty

[Jaye]

I don't often get asked who I'm buying for, believe it or not. The few times I have been asked, I've tried to be honest. I've gotten better service, that way. Sometimes the service people look at me funny, but they're usually pretty helpful. I remember one salesperson who was a little awestruck. "I've never helped a man buy clothes for himself before," she told me. "Are you sure?" I asked her. Then I told her to think of me as an "odd-sized woman", one of those hard-to-fit types. She composed herself, and was very helpful thereafter. She helped me find an outfit I never would have thought of myself, and it looks pretty good, too.

[Kathy]

I've been buying for myself for over 30 years and I can't remember ever being asked who they were for. Several comments about my good taste or how pretty the item was but that's about it.

There was one time when the lady at the checkout asked if I wanted the item gift wrapped. I told her no, thank you and almost said I'd be wearing it that evening but I held back.

Love,
Kathy

[Leslie Langford]

As time goes by, people are becoming more and more aware of the existance of us transgendered folk, and no longer see it as a big deal when a man shops for women's clothing - even outside of the so-called "safe" seasons such as Christmas, Halloween, or around St. Valetine's Day (i.e. sexy lingerie)

Once I realized that most shoppers are too pre-occupied with their own concerns to even notice me, my former anxieties just melted away. That was also around the time when I finally realized that the female sales associates in department stores or ladies clothing stores had not all fallen off the turnip truck, and were well aware that many of their male customers were actually shopping for themselves.

Truth is, I have always been made to feel most welcome by these ladies, who invariably compliment me on my selections, and in many cases have offered to help me find matching items or accessories. Sometimes I have agreed, and we have often had the most lovely conversations, just as two GG's would, although minus "the question".

The only places where I have encountered questions (usually half-jokingly) about who my purchases were for was with the less sophisticated retailers such as Wal Mart (i.e. the cashiers), or the various thrift shops that I go to from time to time. I used to deflect these questions in a similarly joking fashion, but now refuse to do so. After all, what right do they have to make me feel uncomfortable?

There was a time when I would worry about freaking out the store staff by buying women's clothing and tried to be as unobtrusive as possible, but the irony is that by doing so, one looks even more suspicious, and that is bound to attract even more attention.

The last time that happened and the cashier asked curiously who I was buying all the clothes I had selected for, I looked her straight in the eyes and said that they were for me, and that I enjoyed wearing women's clothing from time to time. Although I caught her off-guard, she quickly composed herself and said "Cool", and then asked "So what do you do?". Not wishing to engage in a lengthy conversation (besides, other customers were starting to line up at the cash), I simply said that I have fun, and that ended it. Bottom line - the earth did not come to a grinding halt, no one fainted or threw up, nor was I arrested and frog-marched out of the store. They were happy to take my money, I was happy with my new clothes, and it was "win-win" all around.

As others have pointed out, if we act normally and as if buying women's clothing for ourselves is the most natural thing in the world, that confidence is projected onto the store staff, and they pick up the same vibes and reflect them back on us.

The way I see it, if the cashier with the spiked purple hair, goth make-up, tattoos, body-piercings, mis-matched clothes, torn fishnets and Doc Martens is not embarrassed by her sartorial choices, why should I be?

[Virginia]

Since I have been shopping so much in our local Goodwill store the clerks have gotten to know me (Sorry, but it has always been "en drab" just seems to work out that way) Lately, I'd say in the past three or four months it has become more and more crowded. (See my story about the elderly lady finding a matching glove for me in the "Ladies Bin" where everything is a $1.00. She saw the slips and panties I had found ( all brand new I might add) and first she said," Kinda in the wrong bin aren't you, sonny?" As I started to walk away with the mate to the glove and my other "unmentionables" she smiled and said, "hope all that fits!"
Anyway I digess, I have found some fantastic bargins, you just have to have no qualms about going through the women's sections, skirts, blouses, pants, dresses. Rack after rack. I had a nice conversation once with a nice lady in a wheel chair as we searched the skirt racks! One of the clerks had her daughter with her and introduced her to me (probably 13 -14). Friday I was laying out my treasures on the counter (three blouses, two skirts, a VS slip) and I asked her how her daughter was and her eyes lit up and she gave me a big smile and told me a few things about how a 13 year old girl is a mess, etc. Anyway, people behind me evidently noticed my purchases, but no one has ever said anything negative to me shopping or standing in line or at the check-out, so girls,
SHOP ON!!!!!
Virginia

[Beauty]

Hi,

Well I did it. I finally just went into the GAP (Womens) it was a women's only GAP store and I purchased two pairs of jeans.

It was a baby step, so I didn't look at tops or anything and there were some cute ones there. Still I did it. I broke through a personal barrier or I jumped the hurdle.

It felt good and thank goodness the jeans fit or I would have had to take them back and I would have been faced with my fear again to quick, which would have meant I wouldn't have taken them back. Thankfully I don't have to worry about that.

I went to the movies with my wife and I wore one of the pair I purchased today. They are comfy.

I don't think I would have done it without Sallee's thread and all of the posts here, so thank you everyone!

Beauty

[DonnaT]

Yeahhhhhh

Congratulations Beauty!

Next time it will be easier.

[Beauty]

Hi Donna,

Thank you so much!!!

I trust you and I hope it's true for me as it was for you.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Beauty

[Kathy]

Good for you, Beauty!

And, yes, it really does get easier each time.

Love,
Kathy

[Beauty]

Hi Kathy,

Thank you!

That would be great if it does get easier for me too.

Beauty

[Rikki]

A few years ago I got the nerve to go (openly) to a square dance shop and buy the outfits of my dreams. I called the owner before hand and explained that I was the friend of another CD'er who she knew and wanted to buy some things. Told her I would arrive late in the afternoon so when I arrived she locked the doors, pulled the shades and let me have free run of the shop. I tried on everything and with her help found several gret outfits and 3 crinolines. It was one of the greatest rushes of my life. (that''s one of the outfits in my avatar)

By the look on her face I think she was surprised to see that I was wearing hose under my jeans when I arrived!! With the decline in square dancing these days she probably does more sales with CD'ers than real dancers.

My only other shopping outings are met with the day to day lack of service that we all get no matter what we buy. Due to my passion for full skirted fashion, most of my purchases come from ebay with great success. If the postman only knew
rr