Buying female clothing

[Sallee]

You go girl. Beauty you'll be out shopping up a storm before long. I must admit I use to have trouble but now I get a bit of a thrill out of shopping for womens clothes in my size. I won't call it embrassment just kind of a vicareous thrill. GO GIRL have fun....Sallee

[Beauty]

Hi Sallee,

Thank you so much again for starting this thread.

I have been saying I wanted a pair of jeans on this forum for over a year. My wife went out and got a pair for me and they were what I wanted (no pockets) but they were also hip huggers.

So this time I went out and got the kind that I wanted. I also asked the cashier if they were hip huggers or normal and he said they were normal. He was very polite actually.

Thanks again Sallee!!!

Beauty

[Wendy]

sallee, good for you for working up the courage and going shopping dressed. That is something that I don't think I have the guts to do just yet.

[Charla]

Only twice in 20 some years of shopping have I got comments...one time in California, a clerk at a really low cost place made a big deal of the bras and apnties I was wearing...and one time in Foley's in Houston a clerk asked if I wanted the slimmer and bra gift-wrapped. I said no, and asked where the restrooms where, and changed and left the bag behind.

[Virginia]

Beauty, Beauty, Beauty, you can even wear those jeans if you come down here!!! Proud of you girl!!! I am still challenged with sizes in women's pants, so I usually buy the ones with the elastic waist bands and so far have had good luck! I did go "endrab" to Hecht's once and buy three bras, they were having a 2 for 3 sale. The girl never asked me anything as to who they were for. I asked about the return policy and content with that I left! It is tough to interact with the sales people and really compounds the situation if you YOU ask to try something on -- that is kind of a dead give away on who the items are for .
You are doing great so SHOP ON!!!!

Virginia

[Virginia]

Rikki,
Evidently you square-dance!!! That is so cool! I know a couple that are semi-professional and go all over to square dances. She has a special room in their house where they keep their outfits. Her skirts take up a lot of room.
What is the line"turn your partner round and round pick her up and slam her down!" naw that is some rap song. Anyway, square dance on!!!
Virginia

[Beauty]

Beauty, Beauty, Beauty, you can even wear those jeans if you come down here!!! Proud of you girl!!! I am still challenged with sizes in women's pants, so I usually buy the ones with the elastic waist bands and so far have had good luck! I did go "endrab" to Hecht's once and buy three bras, they were having a 2 for 3 sale. The girl never asked me anything as to who they were for. I asked about the return policy and content with that I left! It is tough to interact with the sales people and really compounds the situation if you YOU ask to try something on -- that is kind of a dead give away on who the items are for .
You are doing great so SHOP ON!!!!

Virginia

Hi Virginia,

Thank you!

Beauty

[Danette]

You girls did it for Me. I'm go to the gym tomorrow and sign up. And when I lose all this weigh, I'm going shopping. It may take Me awhile, But I'm going to do it. I'm so jealous of you girls, But what an inspiration you all are. THANK YOU

Luv Ya,
Danette

[Stephanie H]

What I have found is that being consistant in my shopping locations, It has eliminated a lot of anxiety. Small shops, first thing in the morning never on Saturdays. Monday or Tuesday or the best. Stafff is not busy with other customers and can be more helpful is item selection. Especialy in matching colors and type of fabrics that work well together.
Stephanie

[Wendy]

What I have found is that being consistant in my shopping locations, It has eliminated a lot of anxiety. Small shops, first thing in the morning never on Saturdays. Monday or Tuesday or the best. Stafff is not busy with other customers and can be more helpful is item selection. Especialy in matching colors and type of fabrics that work well together.
Stephanie

well, christmas is just around the corner, so that is always a good time to buy clothing without feeling too 'awkward'.

I totally agree, weekdays is the best days to go shopping. Less sales staff and less people around. If you go first thing when they open, you sometimes can have the whole dept. to yourself for half hour or more.

[Veronica Smith]

I have probably bought women's clothing a couple of hundred times in the last 20 years or so. I usually purchase things at department stores or ladies clothing stores, but occasionally at a discount store. I have never had anyone say anything negative. Many times they ask if I want a box or a gift receipt. I always say yes. Sometimes the clerk will comment on how lucky my wife is that I have such good taste (typically when I'm buying lingerie).

The closest thing I had to a negative comment is one time I was purchasing a couple of babydoll nighties at Gordman's, a discount store where there is one central checkout area near the door. In a joking way the clerk asked me "are these for you?" I wasn't expecting that, but answered with a sarcastic "sure" that left the impression that I meant of course not.

I used to go to a Frederick's of Hollywood store and often purchased things there. They often had the same clerk working there and I just KNOW she was aware I was buying things for myself. She never said anything directly, but after I came in a few times she didn't ask if I wanted a box or tissue to wrap it in. I wanted very badly to ask if I could try something on, but never worked up the courage. I ended up buying quite a few items that didn't fit well because of that.

The best thing that ever happened was in the Jones Store department store, when I went to the counter of the lingerie department with two pairs of panties. The clerk (probably in her 60's) asked if I wanted one of their "bra and panty club" cards. You buy 12 pair of panties or 6 bras and get one free. I said sure, she punched holes for the first two panties and I went back to that same store three or four more times until I bought my 12 pair of panties and got my free one. I always wondered whether they started that club with crossdressers in mind. It would take my wife years to buy 12 pairs of panties!

CDVeronica2

[Amy Santos]

I'm still trying to completely overcome my fear and paranoia of shopping for women's clothes. I was looking at a few tops at Hot Topic today, but I just couldn't work up the courage to buy anything. But I guess the fear and paranoia was somewhat legitimate since

1. I buy a lot of my male clothing in this particular store and I know that most of the salespersons probably recognize me
2. The store was pretty close to my home and I was afraid I'd run into someone from school
3. My dad was waiting right outside the store and I was afraid he'd check what I bought (he's not into the whole skulls and inverted pentagram thing)

Oh well, I'll buy those things I want at another Hot Topic at a mall a little farther away from my house.

[Stephanie H]

Veronica: I have been shopping in the Hanes Store for years for Bras and Panties. They also have a card club for a 20% discount after purchasing $150.00 worth of items. If you need socks, you can also get them there.
Tuesday , I went to the local Dress Barn store and they had a new sales clerk there who at first was "stand-off-ish" but when Wendy came by to help me, she became more friendly and even helped to pick out a matching skirt for the sweater that I liked and would only purchase if I could get a matching skirt.
I was probably in the store for the better part of 2 hours and having all the assistance that I needed. Several GG showed up a few times but there was only eye contact and not in a negative way. At the check out, there was another gg behind me and when I turned around, she just smiled and I returned the favor.
The more I shop, the more comfortable I get and have developed the self-assurance that is needed to project confidence.

[Stephanie W]

Aah shopping!! Don't ya just luv it? However, shopping en drab can indeed be a difficult thing to do if you're looking for femme clothes. I still remember vividly my first time. But it need not be so traumatic. If you are still really nervous, I would try stores such as Walmart or any other big store that sells both male and female clothing. What I do is once I have found something femme I like, I take it with me and head over to the men's clothing area and pick out a pair of jeans or a shirt. Then nonchalantly tuck the femme item under the male item and head to the men's changing rooms. In Walmart for example, the staff have always just directed me without asking what I am trying on. The odd time you may be asked how many items you have, then just be honest and give them a number. It's the only way to buy something you know for sure is going to fit you - and see what it looks like on.

In my experiences en drab which have encompassed every type of women's clothing store imaginable, I have had a few looks here and there and the occasional tongue-in-cheek comment but never anything negative. Most stores are just happy to take your money. One pretty young gal at a checkout one time commented that the colour of a top I was buying was definitely my colour. I just smiled and said, "Why, thank you for saying so". No question she knew I was buying for myself. A few other times, I've had salesgirls jokingly ask if I was buying for myself but then assume it's for a wife or g/f. I never deny it isn't for me as I like to keep them guessing.

If you do tell them it's for your wife, g/f mom, sister or whomever, they'll probably ask you what size you are looking for. What I do is size the salesgirl up and if she is smaller than me, I'll say "something a little bigger than your size" or if she is about my size, I'll say, "about your size I think" and then ask what size I should be looking for. Most of the time they will expect us not to have a clue so play dumb and let her help you. Always ask if you can make an exchange or get a refund if it doesn't fit 'her' then you have nothing to lose.

Shopping en femme is the most fun of all!!! No doubt about it! Going into a clothing store, you lose all sense of not belonging there and being able to take something off the rack and hold it up against yourself to see what it looks like is wonderful. No one takes any notice. It took me a few tries before I had the courage to enter the inner sanctum of the ladies change room and try something on but what a feeling! Nothing like it. I should say the first time I did that was when I had a GG friend with me which is a great help for those of you thinking of taking a shopping trip en femme. She can do all the talking (which is a Godsend sometimes!) and does provide some good cover to help you out of some tough spots should they arise (such as restroom breaks). I have found that most people will barely notice you (as long as you are making an attempt to fit in).

Another tip is to check out TG web resources for TG friendly places in your area. Often you can find some good recommendations of certain friendly stores from other T girls who have had a good experience there, so keep an eye out for those.

So get out there and have fun.

Stephanie

[Brittany]

Okay--perhaps this is the attitude that got me into trouble this week. However, if I go shopping it simply isn't fun unless I give some clue that the clothing is for *me*. I rarely am in the situation to go to the extreme (I have to get a feeling the salesperson is cool with me shopping there), but my biggest thrill is for an attractive girl/lady to know that the bra I'm picking out is for me, etc., and even better if I get to try it on. Oftentimes I'll go into a store to try on a sheer blouse and pull a bra I'm carrying out of my pocket, slip it on and put the shirt on over it. When I come out of the dressing room the reactions are spectacular! I've been asked everything from "Did you wear that in?", "Why do you wear bras?" all the way to "That bra is so pretty! Where did you buy it?"

Anyway, in the very least I'll make some little comment when they ask for a size. If it's a skirt or pants I may tell them my waist measurement, os simply say "I think I'm a 12". If I'm shopping for bras I always ask for styles with stretchy cups since I'm flat-chested. EVERY SINGLE TIME the person has come back with an inquisitive look that strikes up an entertaining conversation, and I live in the Bible Belt!!! Face fact... guys shopping for a girlfriend are wife will stumble around and be clueless on sizes, etc. If you go into a store with even an inkling of such knowledge you're going to be suspect.

I have numerous GG friends that I've made shopping in retails stores, and they say they can spot a guy shopping for himself in a heartbeat. Every single one that I know prefers for a man to be more upfront... it seems odd, suspicious and underhanded for someone to be poking around and constantly looking over their shoulder. Lastly, if you're REALLY nervous, call ahead. Ask to just drop by and speak to the manager one day without shopping to break the ice--you'll be amazed how much it relaxes the situation. If they seem kind, relaxed and genuine, plan to come back to shop. If not, try it again elsewhere. Many shops also are willing to open before or after hours, and there's no harm in asking.

I'm not for offending anyone, so I'm always more careful than not. However, most people are going to get in the least a kick out of it--they'll go home or call a friend and say, "Guess what happened to me today?!!?" Life is short--have some fun! Just don't get drunk and do anything totally stupid... <ugh>