My happiness?

[Sheena]

These are happy times indeed!!! I've never been so happy in my life. I've met a wonderful lady in queensland who accepts my CDing, I've come out to my step mum, I've also come out to 2 of my close girl freinds. I've finally found my happiness (I think!!!). But it seems my feminine side is getting stronger and stronger everyday. Is it possible to get too comfy with my feminine side? It seems that since I've beaten my fear and guilt, I have no nerves at all which makes me shop more for dresses, lingerie, everything. I dont even care about peoples thoughts now. On top of that, I've always had the ambition to have my dream ball gown to be made, well its happening. I met a lady called Mary who has designed the most beautiful ball skirt, its long, flowing, to the floor chiffon which twirls when you spin around. This is the start of a new me, but is it getting out of hand.

[Darla]

CONGRATULATIONS!!

I think what you have done is great, i wish i could just walk into the shop and buy girl clothes without making an excuse.

P.S. i don't think you can have too much of a feminine side.

[Beauty]

Hi Sheena,

I'm really happy things are going so good for you. If your feelings of being more feminine, for lack of a better term, is getting strong then would you consider talking to a gender therapist?

Often gals can get so caught up in self diagnosis they end up making decisions about going further to live as a woman or using self therapy when they really should talk to a professional who's seen many people who run the gamut from those who like to wear womens clothing, to those who like to wear women's clothing full time, but want to stay male, to those who thought they wanted to become women, but realized they were taking erotic thoughts and wanted to be trapped in a woman's body so they'd be forced to live as a woman (lots of suicides there), to those who were in denial that they were a TS and with therapy they realize they are (hmmm.. who does that remind me of), to those who want to live both female and male lives, to those who want to live life and a man professionally and live their lives as a woman, to those who've know their whole lives they were born in the wrong body. There are even more variances out there.

Wouldn't it be great to have help finding out who you are or where you fit in versus guessing or using forums where you can't say what you feel out loud and here yourself? This way you talk it out and know who you are and where you are and it was your decision. It was well thought out and you feel good about what you've said and the conclusions to what you've made. A good therapist will listen and let you talk. They do give advice sometimes, but usually when you ask for it. I highly recommend if you think this has gotten to a level where you think it's not what you thought you should talk to someone. Therapy doesn't have to last forever, but just to get your arms around who you are and where you fit on the TG'd spectrum, so you don't go one step too far and put yourself in harm's way.

I wish you well, even if you don't choose the therapy route. It was right for lots of people, but it doesn't mean it's right for everyone.

Beauty

[Virginia]

Sheena,
Honey, take in all of what Beauty said!!! You are at a crossroads, believe it or not. There is a saying, I think it is attributed to the great Yankee baseball catcher, Yogi Berra, "I came to a fork in the road, so I took it!" It appears that you are at that fork! It is great, because you have options, like a chess game as long as you have a move your are not in check! But you also have the option of taking your time and deciding what is best for you. You are the one that has to look in the mirror every day and determine who you see looking back at you!
We are here for you and if we can offer suggestions or alternatives -- some of your sisters here have been in the same situation and their decisions have varied so that you will get a variety of suggestions, BUT you will have to make the final decision as to what will make you happy!
Love,
Virginia

[Anita]

Hi Sheena--
It's fun to read about you getting what you want! It is a very happy feeling to see that the world doesn't stop turning when you go out there as a girl, not once but many times.

There can be some fear around "getting what you want," so I wouldn't be surprised if you feel something like that. Or if you are wondering just how far the feminine side is going to take you, which is what I think Beauty is talking about. Therapy is a great idea, to at least consider.

I felt happy like you, when I started going out. At the same time, I felt a fear that someone or something was going to take all this away. It was too good; someone would step in and stop it. After months of just doing it, these feelings finally went away. I saw that ultimately, the only person who could stop this was me, and I was not going to quit.

I also still wonder how far this will take me, and that's just part of life now. I do have a new therapist, so we will talk about this eventually

[DonnaT]

Congratulations on reaching your comfort zone.

As for getting out of hand, it's not as long as you can afford it. It seems you are in the place many of us have reached, and many wish to attain.

However, if you find yourself moving past this zone, such as mentioned by Beauty, take her advice seriously. I've know a few t-girls that have gone and had GRS, only to regret it, after getting caught up in the euphoria you now feel.