gender (- uh, no, rather -) Men and Household

General talk about CD/TGing and gender topics that aren't necessarily fun things we do while en femme, or for gender-driven discussions.

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Xenia
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gender (- uh, no, rather -) Men and Household

Post by Xenia »

Hi,

often I've read that women complain about the men sitting and letting them doing the housework. I can't but agree

Now, my dear colleagues (except of two all male) regularly drive me crazy with not putting their glasses, cups, plates into the dishwasher - they leave it to someone else (most often me, or one of the gg-girls - but they are only part-time like some other colleagues, too). If the do load the dishwasher, then they do not know, how to effectively fill it, plus that the cutlery has its place in the little basket and that the blades etc. should stick out of it. Not the big knives of course - funny enough, they usually wind up in the basket, effectively blocking the whirling device, which makes the dishwasher function.
And the crumbs after the coffee breaks, the rests of todays (if I don't take care then certainly several days)

!!arg!! Aaaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhh, @33@ MEN -,,- !!! :sad:

Of course, finally I am one of the girls (tg and gg) and complaining hasn't helped a iota in 2 years so we simply do our job, the lasses cleaning up after the lads ... :) otherwise my XY-fellows here are good colleagues, but I think this is in the genes (may be in the jeans?)

best

Xenia
Violet: Normal? [...] What does anyone in this family know about being normal? [...] We act normal, mum, I want to be normal, the only normal one around here is Jack-Jack and he's not even toilet trained. [The Incredibles]
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Virginia
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Post by Virginia »

Well, Xenia,
I have told my daughter and I guess most of my "girl" friends a simple phrase that seems to fit virtually every situation.

ALL MEN ARE PIGS!!!!
Virginia
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Post by Loretta Ann »

Now where is the Barf bucket? Oink, Oink, Oink.
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Post by DonnaT »

I'd say it would have more to do with how they were raised.
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Post by Beauty »

Hi Xenia,

Since you are a man are you saying you hate yourself? :-k

Men annoy me to, but since I don't really know you I can't tell if you're bashing men. :huh:

Some of my biggest idols are men.
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Carol B
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Post by Carol B »

The path of this thread has struck a cord with me. I can't stand most "men". They are so annoying. Especially when driving. I'm constantly getting the feeling that there is way too much testosterone out there.

Funny thing is I was just diagnosed with "low T". :-k I have no problem with cleaning up after myself. I also agree that it may have more to do with how one is raised.
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Virginia
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Post by Virginia »

My statement is sort of "tongue in cheek!" But for Beauty, some of your idols are men is great, but you don't have to live with them as a woman either, so it is not likely you know, as Charlie Rich says,"What Goes On Behind Closed Doors!"
With the divorce rate at 50% - and the fact that as I posted earlier and I have seen it reaffirmed recently on Television, that in a geneome comparison we = males are a lot closer in comparison gene wise to the Great Apes than we are to the females of our species. The book, " Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Vensus." sites so many differences just between the species, let alone what happens when you throw in socio-economic back-grounds, education, parental influences, siblings, crossdressing - uh scratch that last one :lol: :roll: If you seriously look at relationships - men are basically good for one thing and that is presevation of the species and women control that instinctively and evidently 50% of the time mistakenly. Are humans unique or what? :-k
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Post by Beauty »

Hi,

It doesn't change my mind that these statements about men that you are is still self hate and not healthy.

I respect that you think that men are scum and I don't have to live with a man or woman for them to be my idol.

Lately it seems Virginia that you are on one end of the planet and I'm on another. I haven't really agreed with a lot you've had to say lately, but I can't figure out why. So I'll just shush because you aren't saying anything wrong. I'm just not vibing on anything you're saying. :huh:

I'm out of this one. Bash men until your hearts content.

:: coffee talk voice ::
Talk amongst yourselves.
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Post by Loretta Ann »

Beauty wrote: It doesn't change my mind that these statements about men that you are is still self hate and not healthy.
I am with her on that one.
She also wrote: I respect that you think that men are scum and I don't have to live with a man or woman for them to be my idol.
Sometimes I wonder if we all live in the same world? I personally know many men (most who are friends) who do not fit that picture. "Not even close".
She also wrote: Lately it seems Virginia that you are on one end of the planet and I'm on another. I haven't really agreed with a lot you've had to say lately, but I can't figure out why. So I'll just shush because you aren't saying anything wrong. I'm just not vibing on anything you're saying. :huh:
That includes me.
She also wrote:I'm out of this one. Bash men until your hearts content.
Me too I am out of this one. Bash away just like we accuse others of doing to us. #-o
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Virginia
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Post by Virginia »

I got to reply, I just gotta!!!! First, I do not self-hate (in general) what I "hate" is that I was unable to save my marriage because I could not convience my wife that "I am not a pig!" I have, in the past, usually been very good at at least getting someone to at least listen to my side of a disagreement, but in this case, I did not even get to bat! I told her and she evidently had some preconceived idea, notion, picture and no one was going to change that!!! "He's a crossdresser, ahhh the plague!, divorce!"
As for me or men being "scum," I did not ever use that term. My point is that women in general just do not understand men. they tolerate men, but they do not understand generally why we do what we do. The inability to ask directions, the "secretly" glancing at other females (don't think for a second they don't see us looking - its there nature to notice us noticing "the competition.") The point is that we = males and females struggle to get along and in marriage with 50% ending in divorce and how many remain together for the sake of _____________ fill in the blank?
It ain't easy out here is it!
As for idolizing someone, I guess that is OK as long as it is controlled. I idolize Donald Trump for all his money or Bill Gates, don't know that I would want to be them or live with them, but I admire what they have accomplished.
To reiterate, I don't hate me or men or think they are "scum." Women just see us different than we see ourselves and very seldom do either live up to the other's expectations.
Virginia
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Post by Absaroka »

I am wondering if there is some sort of a time table when women start to pick up after men. At what age?

For example my teenage daughters can't even pick up after themselves let alone anyone else. Their friends are just as bad.

My wifes solution is to pick up after them. My solution is to tell them to pick up after themselves. They have actually come out and asked why they should when their mother seems to enjoy picking up after them. And I have to admit that although she says she hates it she has a lot of troulbe telling them to do it. Her solution is to complain that I don't help her pick up after them enough. I imagine volumes could be written just about that last sentance.

Does this mean my parents are having their revenge from beyond the grave?

On a more serious note Virginia I really doubt that we are closer genetically to apes than to women. If that were true we would be able to breed with female apes, not human women. Men and women are more alike than they are different.

To quote a bumper sticker:

men are from Earth
women are from Earth too
deal with it.


Andrea
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Xenia
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Post by Xenia »

Hi,
Beauty wrote:Hi Xenia,

Since you are a man are you saying you hate yourself? :-k

Men annoy me to, but since I don't really know you I can't tell if you're bashing men. :huh:

Some of my biggest idols are men.
No, I am sorry, that I didn't make myself understood better. May be I should have expressed it differently:
Women, men, (and other genders ...) are all human beings and since there are a lot of idols of all genders out there, I would find it of course counterproductive to bash or hate any of them.

I just hate that kind of behavior. Would do so if I would observe it in women, too - but I can't remember any instance.
Was just an observation ...

Best
Xenia
Violet: Normal? [...] What does anyone in this family know about being normal? [...] We act normal, mum, I want to be normal, the only normal one around here is Jack-Jack and he's not even toilet trained. [The Incredibles]
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Xenia
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Post by Xenia »

Hi,

the whole published outrageous Venus-Mars-nonsense is just terrible.
I think there is definitely a political agenda behind its publishing success.
I am sorry, but I will not discuss assumed or real gender similarities or differences on the basis of that kind of books

Women and Men and other Genders are all from Earth nothing else. And however one tries to find or define categories (which our mall brains do all the time, even if we intellectually know that it is more complicated), they have are more similar and share more than there are differences between them.

Best

Xenia
Violet: Normal? [...] What does anyone in this family know about being normal? [...] We act normal, mum, I want to be normal, the only normal one around here is Jack-Jack and he's not even toilet trained. [The Incredibles]
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Xenia
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Post by Xenia »

Hi,

I am sorry that my post created something, which is out of proportion to me. Of course it has to do with some of my statements which I formulated and which were taken to general.

But it was not meant to be a general assault on men, and I wrote that my colleagues otherwise are nice people. I'd like to add: most other men are also good people.
My own struggle with gender identity does certainly not make me a men-hater.

best

Xenia
Violet: Normal? [...] What does anyone in this family know about being normal? [...] We act normal, mum, I want to be normal, the only normal one around here is Jack-Jack and he's not even toilet trained. [The Incredibles]
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Like? Dislike? Men.

Post by Charlene Marie »

Interesting thread. When I think about it, in the last 20 or so years I've had about 5 good men friends. I guess I just don't like B.S. artists, men who cheat on their wives, and absolute sports fanatics. I wouldn't miss
Monday or Sunday football, but probably because my wife likes it also.
In general, I agree with what Jack Lemon said in "Some Like It Hot."
" Men!, vulgar hairy beasts, they only want one thing from a girl."

As for being a slob, I'm not, I'm very neet. I have to be because my wife
is the consumate house cleaner, sometimes too extremes.
My God, she spreads newspaper under the cookoo clock.

For as long as I can remember I've always had lots of girl friends. Ones
to hang out with and ones to make out with. AH! perhaps that's it, I just want to be some girls best girl friend. :lol:
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