Question about wearing a bra fulltime

[Sylvia]

Hello

First let me say this is a wonderful website. This Dear GG thread is an awesome idea.

Now to my question.

Since the cold weather is here I have been wearing a bra fulltime. I only wear my C sized forms when I have a jacket on to avoid attention.

Would a saleslady be offended if she could see I am wearing a bra? Would she treat me like a customer or a freak?

I mean it is only clothes we are wearing. There is no intent to make a saleslady uncomfortable. It is her experience and help with size and style I am wanting.

What do women think of us wearing feminine clothing under our male stuff?

I hope someday us CDs can openly wear what we want without people thinking we are wierd.

Thanks, Sylvia

[SilverLady(SO)]

Hi, Sylvia

We, too, think this is a wonderful website, and on behalf of everyone who participates here, CD and GG alike, thank you for the compliments!!

Would a saleslady be offended if she could see I am wearing a bra? Would she treat me like a customer or a freak?

We answered a similar question posted by Daniel, entitled How a salesperson feels about crossdressers in their store?, which can be found at this link: http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... 6252#66252

I believe the posts in that thread - where several CDs posted their shopping experiences, also - may answer these questions for you. If not, please let us know by posting again in this thread - just to help keep the topics in some kind of order.

What do women think of us wearing feminine clothing under our male stuff?

To be perfectly honest, you know there are many women who would be against it - if they knew about it - but yet they are probably wearing 'boxer briefs' under their jeans - both of which were typically men's clothing! I qualified that statement purposely - because there are many people, men and women, who have never heard of Crossdressers. Personally, I've always been of the opinion that it's no one's business what anyone else does provided no one else is being harmed by it. But then, I'm one of the minority who holds that opinion.

I hope someday us CDs can openly wear what we want without people thinking we are wierd.

I couldn't agree more!

- SL

[Sylvia]

Thank you so much for your reply

I did read the link you snet me and it helps. As long as security in the stire doesn't pull me into their office wanting to see what is hiding under my jacket I should be ok.............lol

Last time I was shopping there was a certain style of sweater I wanted. The saleslady wasn't sure what I meant so I was tempted to show her what I had on as it was similar but I didn't. Perhaps if that situation comes up again I'll ask her if I can open my jacket to show her.

It sure would be easier if this wasn't suck a big deal in our society.

[TiffanyF]

Hi Sylvia,

Perhaps you don't need to show her what is under your jacket. You could simply ask her if you could try the sweater in the dressing rooms. Some stores don't have a problem with you trying the clothing.

Tiffany

[Sylvia]

Thanks for the advise since this is a bit new to me. I have been dressing for years but never had the nerve to buy at a store. Ebay has been my friend up until now...................

[TiffanyF]

I know it was tough for me the first time I went out and bought something for my femme self. My heart was pounding and I didn't know if I actually wanted to buy or just go home screaming in panic. I had preconceived, in my mind, how the conversation with the sales person would go a thousand times. When I finally got the nerve to go into the store nothing happened like I had pictured it. It was more like:

Sales person: hi, can I help you with anything?
Me: yes, do you have this in blah blah blah
Sales person: sure let me check that for you.

And the rest of the conversation was just as if I was buying something at the sports store.

From that point on I usually just go in the store and browse what I like and buy what I want.

Some advice I can give you from personal experience:

1) Like most others have noted in posts across different forums: most probably no one is looking at you when you are shopping. I've gone in the past and bought presents for my sister and my gf dressed as a male and it might be the physicological idea of it all but I'm not worried about anyone seeing me there.

So keep in minde that other people in the store don't know if you are buying for a friend, relative, girl friend, spouse, SO or yourself.

2) Sometimes the sales person will ask if this is for your gf/wife and sometimes they will ask if the item is for yourself. If you want to save a lot of time just say it is for you. I find that sales people who ask you if the item is for you have had experiences selling to CD/TS/TVs in the past and they are willing to help you.

As an anecdote, I once bought a pair or red pumps from a store with a girl behind the counter. When she asked me if they were for my gf/wife I told her they were for me. She looked at me and said "really?" (she had a look on her face like she could not believe it) but she then proceeded to ask me if I wanted to try them on there or if I would feel more comfortable trying them on in the small room behind the store and then she asked me if I needed hosiery and tried selling me more shoes :D

3) This is just a precaution I personally take and it might not apply to you but as I am still in the closet I try to avoid stores that are near the area I live since I might accidentaly bump into someone I know and then who knows what will happen.

In any case, happy shopping Sylvia, best of luck to you

Tiffany

[Sylvia]

Hello everyone

Well it has been a while since I posted so thought it was time for an update. After visiting a number of department stores and not finding my size of the best of service I decided to look for a bra boutique.

After looking on the internet I located a shop in Toronto who had a website and a contact us for more info. I figured what the heck why not e-mail them. Rather than beat around the bush I decided to tell them I am a male who wears a bra fulltime. They responded to me within the day with some questions on style and size which I answered. The next day they sent me an e-mail with suggestions, styles and suggested I come into the shop.

I was like WOW!! To be sure I asked if they would be offended if I was wearing a bra. They reply was that is no problem at all. I wanted to be sure that if they were to help me I was not going to put pressure the existing clients. The lady I was chatting with in e-mail was thankful for my concerns and suggested I come early in the morning.

That seemed perfect for me as I wasn't wanting to end up in a store full of customers lining up for the fitting rooms.

Well all of this being said I did go the other day and purchased a bra that I took home. The girl that waited on me was the same one in the e-mails which was great. At the time there was a customer in the store that might have been sensitive to me dropping into the fitting room beside her. The saleslady suggested I take the bra home and let her know how it fits. I was reminded that there would be no troubles to return it if necessary.

So this morning after a couple of e-mails were sent I took off to exchange the bra and try on a few others she had set aside for me. This is the funny part.......................

I go in the shop only to see a young girl behind the cash who I had not met the last time. She was quite friendly so I told her I was here to see Susan. While I waited for Susan the phone rang so not having anything else to do I listened to the young girl talk to the customer.

I know .....I know.........get to the punch line.

It was a guy on the phone inquiring about lingerie and other feminine products. The young girl was running out of answers as this guy wanted to come into the store and try on girdles, bras and whatever else he could. Now I could have gone all red being that I was there for a similar reason. The young girl passed the phone to an older saleslady who handled the call. At this point Susan came out to greet me and suggested I follow her to the fitting room.

I think the young girl probably wondered what is going on here by now. All in all niether of the salesladies said anything to me to make me uncomfortable.................Aren't women great?

So I tried on 3 bras and Susan called out to me to see if I needed help. I replied I am all done so she opened the door as I was picking up my jacket. She had a good look of my 38C formed filled bra but never said a word.

At the cash counter she continued to talk to me about the 3 bras agreeing that the one I picked would be the best for me. She said try the bra out for a few days and let her know what I think of it.

So..........now I have a new shop to go to without any worries. A lady friend to me said keep this in your mind when you shop.........."It doesn't matter what anyone thinks as long as you are spending money in their shops"

That gave me the right attitude to go out on my own forms and all.

[Carol Ann]

Hi Sylvia,
I have never had a hard way to go with a sales person when it came to buying female cloths. I have ask for help with purchasing bras before and the ladies didn't even bat an eye, they were very helpful. Now I will admit I haven't ask to try on a skirt, dress, or bra in the store as I have my size down pat. Carol Ann

[DonnaT]

Cool, and the young sales girl was learning something new as well.

[Stephanie W]

Hi Sylvia

Thanks for sharing your wonderful experience. I'm glad everything went well. As a fellow T.O gal, I was just wondering what was the name of the store you went to? Thx.

Stephanie

[Sylvia]

Hi Sylvia

Thanks for sharing your wonderful experience. I'm glad everything went well. As a fellow T.O gal, I was just wondering what was the name of the store you went to? Thx.

Stephanie

Hi Stephanie

May I say you look very feminine in your pics to start things off?

Now the name of the boutique is the Bra Boutigue. Here is the website:

http://www.braboutique.com/

They are more expensive than a department store for sure but the girls are very knowledgable on their extensive lines. They are known for having hard to find sizes so for us CDs it is perfect.

I suggest that if you go there a phone call a day ahead will help them out. I am finding women don't like CD surprises so if you call don't beat around the bush just let them know what you are looking for and the size. Like I said I was there when a male called kicking the tires so to speak...........they get that a fair bit and are not impressed.


All the best and I hope you share your story here too.

Sylvia

[Stephanie W]

Thanks Sylvia for the info (and the compliment) I'll certainly share any experience I have.

Stephanie

[Sylvia]

Thanks Sylvia for the info (and the compliment) I'll certainly share any experience I have.

Stephanie

Hey Stephainie that would be great !!!

I plan on going back next week as I asked them today to order me the same bra I bought in beige. Maybe I should have ordered a different style so I could try it on there..............mmmmmm.........he he

[Stephanie W]

Sylvia, you need to start building some memories! Gotta go try one on next time. Maybe ask her if you can anyway and see what she says.

Stephanie

[Sylvia]

Sylvia, you need to start building some memories! Gotta go try one on next time. Maybe ask her if you can anyway and see what she says.

Stephanie

Hey Stephanie..............I did try a couple on last time which was so cool. What I meant above is rather than just order a new bra of the same type I should order something different so each time I can try them on there..........he he.