Hi Carol,
I'm sorry to hear that your wife won't let you go out.
When I first started going out 7 months ago, it was to a support meeting and I was on cloud 9. I guess the last few months, I have "spread my wings" to a certain agree. Now it is not enough to just go to meetings. I want to be a part of general society as Steffie. Going to stores, malls, movies and clubs consitute that. I guess it's my "coming out party" or something like that.
Did you ask your wife if she will a least let you go out far away from your home? I never dress as Steffie in my neighborhood and never leave my house as Steffie. Maybe if you and your wife go on a vacation to a place fa away, she will let you be Carol? Hopefully in time she will realize this. I know it took a while for my wife to realize I need to be Steffie but now she realizes this and tell me she will not stand in my way if I want to go out. I still try and spend quality time with her as male too (i.e., movies, dinners, etc.) as well as make her breakfast in bed and dinner sometimes. I find this helps.
Good luck and keep us posted!
Steffie
Strength lies solely in tenacity.