What do you call him/her when he is dressed

[Vanessa]

Hmmm, I have a few friends in the yahoo chats that call me Vanessa, I dont mind it and I kinda like it at times. I dont think on anyone calling me Vanessa, its just a name someone tagged me with because of me given name, VAN. I wouldnt be offended if Loy, my betterhalf called me that but I dont see that happening, but you never know:)

Love you all,

Van -- Vanessa:)

[Geri Robinson]

When I first came out to my wife we decided to call me Wendie. We used that name for about a year then one day she told me she had a hard time calling me Wendie. So after doing some talking we decided on Geri, for it mirrored my real name. Same name, just spelled differently. Like me, same person just dressed differently. My daughter calls me daddy even when we go out.

[Stormy(SO)]

My dh did not have a name because until I had told him I knew that he had women's clothes he'd never thought of having a feminine name. He was cautious because he knew that I was maybe ok with his dressing since I wasn't shrieking at him however I wasn't ok with it until I heard the why's and when's....now I'm very ok with all of it and we do have alot of fun together....I digress.....I asked him what he'd like to be called while dressed and together we picked out Melyssa Anne or Missy for short! I do not call him by his given name while he's dressed.

Stormy

[Kerri]

I have been known as jimiwullie since I was a wee loon.
I am also known as Gus, Unk, Dad, Pops, Little Bro, Rodney and since last September, Grandad!

My name is Jim, but I was christened James which is my Sunday name.
I only adopted a femme name when I joined the Beaumont Society in '81.

Up till then any of the above was sufficient, though my mum and my wife do refer to me as bugger lugs in conversation.

I see no need for femme names, the hand I was dealt with by fate gave me a male body and a love of wearing feminine lingerie and gowns.

My names were given to me by people and in general they were chosen to honour family members.

I chose Kerri cos I like the name, and I know nobody with the same name.

CU later,

Kerri
x

[Lisbeth]

My wife usually calls me "Hon" or babe or my given male name. When I'm dressed she sort of talks about Lisbeth (or Liz) in the third person. She'll say something like "Do you think LIz would like that dress?" I really don't care what she calls me as long as she doesn't stop calling me.
I adopted the name Lisbeth after a wonderful woman that I knew for many years that helped me to understand a great deal about myself and why I do the things I do. She helped me get thru some really hard times in my life and I always admired her strength and wisdom.

[Kimberly Kael]

I definitely prefer the use of my femme name to refer to my feminine aspect. It doesn't really come up much in practice, because my wife doesn't address me by name all that often except when we have company, and Kimberly is kind of shy so far.

We both refer to Kimberly in third-person when I'm in drab, especially when out in public. It just seems natural whether we're talking about my getting dressed up later in the day, or when we see something pretty that would look good on Kimberly while shopping.

[Sunshine Girl(SO)]

Hiya...

I'm still new here, but I find this topic very interesting.

My hubby was born with Klinefelter's Syndrome. He was born kind of a 'tweener as they called KS babies back then. His name is Valentino, as he was born on Valentine's Day. His nickname has alway's been Val, for as long as I have known him, sixteen years now.

I alway's refer to him as "he" or "him". I guess I have picked this up from his mother in the many chats we have had over the years.

Was he raised as a girl? I have never asked his mom this question directly, but she has stated that she seen his "softer side" early in his childhood and has alway's supported him. I have seen pix of him wearing either a skirt or a dress as a child and as a teen.

Does he "dress" full time? Yes, in a way he does. No, not alway's in a skirt or a dress, but all of his things do come from the women's department.

But he is just one person. Just himself.

I feel as if I'm very supportive of guys dressing in any manner they please. We only have a short time here, and we should all enjoy ourselves.

I guess the part of all of this I'm having a hard time with is the guys who talk about "being" two different people. I know everyone is different. Does it have to do with their "male side" rejecting their "female side"? Please don't condemn me, I'm just posting this to try to understand.

I was raised on a farm. I love my horses. Many of my days are spent in jeans, t-shirt and boots? Does that mean I'm a crossdresser? Is the answer no, because I'm not sexually excited about the clothes I'm wearing? Would I want to be thought of or refered to as a different "gender" because of the way I'm dressed? No way.

My birth name is Georgia. My mom has alway's called me Jo-jo. My dad called me Georgie. But I still feel "like a girl" when they do that. It's just me.

I guess what I'm trying to say is just to relax and enjoy who and what you are. Be yourself.

Oh, I understand some of you guys have to hide your "softer side" from your everyday lives. But do you believe in having to, you need to "create" this entirely different person?

It's just a tad confusing to me. But that's kinda why I'm here posting this message.

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
by any other word would smell as sweet."

Luv ya all,
Sunny

[Kimberly Kael]

I guess the part of all of this I'm having a hard time with is the guys who talk about "being" two different people. I know everyone is different. Does it have to do with their "male side" rejecting their "female side"? Please don't condemn me, I'm just posting this to try to understand.

While I don't expect to have a complete answer to your questions, I'd definitely be happy to let you know what little I have figured out - and can speculate a little beyond that.

A big piece of it is being able to have conversations in public without attracting undue attention. "I think that would look good on Kimberly" seems pretty safe compared to "do you think this would look good on me" in a crowded shopping environment. That's certainly a strong incentive to have a femme name handy and once you start using it, it just sticks.

There's also something tied up in not feeling like I can express myself in most of my day-to-day interactions, so I feel a strong urge to overcompensate to bring my life overall back in balance. If I could wear my favorite skirt to work, would I insist on glamorous makeup and breast forms to go with it? Probably not. At least not every day. I think you'd find that the more time each day someone spends cross-dressed, the more likely they are to begin to integrate their male and female personae.

There are two complications that make it hard to examine my own behavior in anything like an objective fashion: the strong social norms that create a "male" and "female" gender norm without well-defined space in-between, and the simple fact that once you've broken one taboo everything else (fetishes, role playing, etc.) seem to naturally join the party. They're difficult, but not impossible, to separate.