Another step

Melyssa Anne · Post by **Melyssa Anne** » Tue Dec 19, 2006 11:03 pm

Well -- another step in the process.

A few weeks ago my wife and I did a "girls weekend" shopping trip. That was my first time out as Melyssa. It was a bit daunting, but a lot of fun -- and no problems at all -- was treated like one of the girls in every store and every dressing room (and every cash register!!---geez did we buy clothes for both of us!!)

So I decided I needed to try and go out without the "protection" of the wife. With her encouragement, I got up this morning and got ready and -- after sitting for a few minutes to work up the nerve--off I went. First stop was an outlet mall (that was the scariest -- all that sunlight isn't friendly on the face makeup -- very harsh light). But I had to go--9 West was calling my name (or rather those cute shoes boots were). Anyways, shoes and purses and other things later, I moved on to the mall. I shopped at leisure all afternoon, trying on shoes, and party dresses, skirts, suits, and on and on. It was delightful. Once again, no problems -- no one outed me, no one even noticed. This was a beautiful thing--to just be able to shop in peace.

Just thought I would share. I am stil on cloud 9-1/2.

By the way, if you can't tell, my wife is the BEST!!!

Jess(SO) · Post by **Jess(SO)** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 3:43 am

Glad you had fun, and remember it will get easier the more you do it

Jess

Carol Ann · Post by **Carol Ann** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 4:51 pm

Good for you

Angie · Post by **Angie** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 9:23 pm

Melyssa,

You go girl!

Visiting the mall at any time of the year is considered a challenge for most of us, what with the throngs of teenagers and such. The holiday shopping season and the accompanying crowds make it that much more daunting. As Jess stated, it does get easier with "practice".

I'm not sure if it is that general public doesn't notice or (more likely) just doesn't care. Folks in retail are usually pretty professional about things. Their job is to make a sale, so they tend to be polite with all customers.

My SO, her daughter and I made the shopping rounds of our local mall this past weekend. Like you, I experienced no obvious signs of "shock and awe". The main thing is to dress like women your age are dressed and be confident. While you're out in the world, you're not a man shopping while dressed as a woman. You're a woman - period.

Knock 'em dead!

Angie

DeniseL · Post by **DeniseL** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 9:54 pm

Congratulations Melyssa on your outing.

From my own experience, i am sure it was thrilling yet almost a bit scary the first time you went out fully femme especially on your own without the help of and or security of your S/O as you shop.

I too found out the even though the mall is a bit scary, especially the first time you go alone, that most people either do not care, are so wound up in their own little world as to what they are looking for, or if they did make you, are too polite to say anything.

The more you go out, the more comfortable you will get. Comfort and confidence is the big thing, and it will not be long till you will be just as comfortable going out femme as you did drab.

Keep up the good work

Denise

Virginia · Post by **Virginia** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 10:03 pm

Angie, you speak the truth!!!! It is confidence, a nice smile and shop till you drop!!!
I have not heard of any "outting" as of late by what were and possibly are our worst enemy and Angie touched on that - a pack = two or more teenage girls!!! As we have said before they are sub-consciously looking for roll models and if they happen upon us and determine that we are not what we appear to be it is like - shall I say - fresh meat to a pack of wolves?!
Anyway I am glad that you had a positive experience and it does tell us one and/or two things. 1). either you pass with NO problem 2). that the general public is in general so involved with their own little world that you could be green and purple and have three heads and no one would notice! (no offense - please!)
We are still the exception not the rule, but with the exposure that we have been getting over the past couple of years on television and in the written word, well maybe we are making more inroads than we think!
Love ya.
Virginia

Melyssa Anne · Post by **Melyssa Anne** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 10:18 pm

Thanks for all your positive words and thoughts!

My wife tells me that I look good and blend in -- it startled her last night when she met me afterwards -- had to look twice to make sure it was me!

Already plotting and scheming my next great shopping trip.

Becky · Post by **Becky** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 7:33 pm

You look great melyssa! Ive done the shopping thing now and then en femme, and a really sympathetic sales clek goes a long way to encourage you, You did great!

Stephanie W · Post by **Stephanie W** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 9:38 pm

I can sense that confidence building in each of your posts. Good for you Melyssa! Glad you had fun that day. I'm sure you know how lucky you are to have Stormy supporting you all the way. That support really does make our 'journey' a little easier but so much more rewarding. Enjoy!

Stephanie

Anita · Post by **Anita** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:39 pm

Hi Missy-
That's a fine post, and it's really good to hear about. Sometimes I still have to catch my breath before I go in somewhere, but most of the time I don't think about it. I feel like I belong out there. I like Angie's quote:

While you're out in the world, you're not a man shopping while dressed as a woman. You're a woman - period.

That's how it feels, and it's why I don't like being "sirred" when I'm out there. I always try to remind the clerks, "When I'm dressed like this, I'm a woman, thank you!"

Here's to more outings in the coming year.