As far back as I can remember!

[Suzie Green]

My story has evoked some spirited conversation between me and my wife. And I think we are both coming to the realization that crossdressing possibly has DNA-type origins. When I was 6 years old and in the first grade in school, I was absolutely smitten with the coat that my friend Joanna wore to school each day. After several weeks, I happened to become the person that had to go outside the classroom each day to get the milk that was served to the students. The fridge was right next to the coat racks, and once out there, I quickly snuck a chance to try on Joanna's coat. Oh god, I was in 7th heaven for those fleeting few seconds! But why was I feeling this at such a young age? There were no apparent outside influences which made me drift this way. Today I conclude that it could possibly be a genetic condition. I wish I knew.

When I was around 8 years old, my mother caught me trying on my sister's clothing. She punished me by telling me that if I wanted to be a girl, she would take me to the next Girl Scout meeting, and I could spend the day sitting with all the other girls. It was humiliation beyond belief, and I think it emotionally affected me for years afterwards.

For the remainder of my life, I passed through thousands of moments, wanting to dress up, but not being able to do so. Then 2 years ago, a moment came when I was able to dress in women's clothing as a gag, as my wife and I were to attend a party. I played it down as a joke, but secretly I was elated. Black skirt, pink top, heels, stockings, a wig purchased from Ebay, and a cute little purse too. The evening could have lasted forever, but it passed by much too quickly!

Then about a couple months ago, my feelings got to the point where I found some high heels, a skirt, and a few other items while browsing on line. I ordered them. Suddenly I had a new wardrobe. I thought, "I can hide this stuff from my wife and use it only when she's not home!" Unfortunately, that is not very often the case, as she is here most of the time, retired from nursing, and disabled with MS. So I bit the bullet and brought up the conversation that I had been dreading for over 33 years.

She took it well. I knew she would, as she is the most understanding partner I could ever have hoped to fall in love with. She is behind me 100% and it has brought a new closeness to us. I have a new friend now, and I'm happier than I have been in 58 years!

Suzie

[Curly(SO)]

I'm so happy that your wife is supporting you

I also am of the school of thought that CDing has something to do with genes, dna etc.

Your beginnings sound very much like my hubby Ed. He said he started to want to dress about six years old too.

Love,
Curly

[Kyra]

Hi Suzie,

Whether it be DNA, genes, hormones, or whatever, I can't really say. I have never been able to what it is that I feel drove me to be who I am. I quit trying to figure out the "why" of it all. Now I simply live enlightened knowing that I have perspective most men don't (or are afraid to show)

I'm really glad to hear of your SO's acceptance level. My wife of 17 years is still coming around. Baby steps for us, but everyday brings progress. I am also glad to hear you can finally be who you really are without hiding (at least from those who matter most)

I loved your story, and hope to hear more later.

Hugs,
Kyra