Guilt is back agian

[Danielle La Belle]

Hi Jill:

Guilt is the result of making a comparison between two states. The state of your mind vs. the state of our culture. How else can one be tall or short if they do not have a point of reference to compare to.

Male or female, typical comparison indeed. We take the external for granted and associate with that external appearance as being the only point of view. First and foremost, we are internally driven. It is that DNA programming that makes us whom we are, not the external package. That is our "Space Suit," that I have talked about previously on this forum.

Match the "Suit" with the personality and typically, you have a happy person for the most part. It is when our "Suit" does not match your internal personality, the conflict rages and we do what we can do express what people expect to see based on the external apperances of our bone structure, our "Space Suit"

Keep that in mind Jill. If you are running away from yourself, you really cannot go very far. Your "self" is trailing right along with you like a shadow. Perhaps you are confused or find that your CD'ing is sexual in nature. There are those that find that to be true as our sexuality is really rather intermingled with our perceptions. They cannot be really separated like some say and that is really good for humanity as a whole.

You must decide of course. No one can live your life but you.

Hugs

Danielle Marie

[Karren Hutton]

Ouch....And I have found out that the two, telling your SO and the guilt thingy are not related.... I got over the guild and shame years ago when I realized that one, Karren was a part of me that wasn't every going away, and two, there is nothing wrong with liking to do what I like to do.... Once I realized that, everything changed for the better....

Now telling the wife..... we are still married and she loves me as her husband... but she isn't a bi fan of my hobby!!!

Good luck!!!

Love Karren

[Jill S]

Hi Karen, I have seen you on the other forum (I'm not a member there).
Your pictures are amazing. You always look like your having soo much fun at it. Only wish I could be that self-accepting. My wife did call to warn be some friend was comeing by today while she was out. She must have thought I was dressing up since I had the house to to myself today. I wasn't, but still will get her flowers to thank her. Not sure how to live with dressing and have my wife not want anything to do with it. Sound like you have worked something out with yours.
Thanks everyone for the advice/ incuragment. Got to go fix one of the dumb cars.

[Ronnie M]

ok. no shuck. no jive.
straight up hun.
I have tried it. threw out hundreds of dollars of great outfits, and panties n' bras, and a couple pairs of custom made heels.
"dammit jim"

can't do it anymore. I have-to-be who I am inside.
I have-to-be the woman I need to be.

but sugar, you have my hopes, and best wishes.

good luck on your journey.

[Karren Hutton]

Hi Karen, I have seen you on the other forum (I'm not a member there).
Your pictures are amazing. You always look like your having soo much fun at it. Only wish I could be that self-accepting. My wife did call to warn be some friend was comeing by today while she was out. She must have thought I was dressing up since I had the house to to myself today. I wasn't, but still will get her flowers to thank her. Not sure how to live with dressing and have my wife not want anything to do with it. Sound like you have worked something out with yours.
Thanks everyone for the advice/ incuragment. Got to go fix one of the dumb cars.

Thank you, Jill.... And I am having fun, else I wouldn't be doing this... lol And my wife has made calls home to me too... I think as a warning to let me know she was coming home... but I now keep it out of her face totally, and I can live with that.... just had to find another way to dress and get out.... mainly on business trips and on half day vacations around here.... So it's a system and it works for me.... The key is balancing the male and family life with the female life.... But above all for me, family comes first and what ever time is left over for Karren is good enough.....

Love karren

[Jill S]

Wow 16 days and her I sit in my wifes long bottom front denim dress that she never wears anymore. I also have a slip on, I know denmi dress= no slip but I have a thing for silky stuff. Now do I tell her I broke down and dressed or let it go unspoken? I'm going to paint my toenails and think on it.
Jill

[Kyra]

Hi Jill,
Sorry your attempt was unsucessful. The truth is, however, most of us have been down that road so many times and know the outcome before it happens. Still, I'm sad to see it didn't work for you.

If you told your wife about the purge, then it's probably the right thing to tell her the outcome. More importantly though, is dealing with the guilt you feel. I would think more focus on this issue would give better results. I've found that telling my SO how I feel, when I feel, what I feel seems to benefit both of us. I'm able to convey more and help her understand more. (At least in my case) This has helped our relationship immensely.

I hope you're able to shed some of the ill feelings you have right now.
Good luck.

Hugs,
Kyra