My first pair of shoes.

[Carla L]

Shoes!

I bought my first pair of shoes at Payless. I was so embarrassed , the clerk was a man and the assistant was a female. I hemmed and hawed a while till I finally got the guts to try some on.

Once I found what I kinda wanted, (I wasn't leaving without a pair of shoes) I finally got up the nerve to check out. The girl was over the side snickering and the guy tells me all shoes are buy one get one half off, and told me I could pick another for 50% off. "Right!"; like I was going to go back and get another pair. I said no thank you, wishing he would just hurry up so I could get out of there!

I have my full outfit on right now! Wig, forms, slips nylons shoes dress, slip, bra. I feel absolutely wonderful.

The only thing I have missing is makeup. One day I'll get the guts to do that.

[Paulie]

Well... if she was snickering at you, I wouldn't let it bother me a bit.

I've picked up a couple pairs of shoes from Payless, and no problems whatsoever with the staff. They've been helpful and friendly. So, don't let one "not so good" experience shake you.

And, you can always check out Payless online and skip the store. The only problem with that is, they have better pricing and specials in store.

Wear your shoes and enjoy yourself!

[Lisbeth]

Hi Robyn,
I've had pretty good luck at Target, of all places. I can usally find something I like, try on the right one( The big one), and when you check out the shoes are in a box. The clerk just scans the UPC code and never even looks at what's inside. They are always having sales too but they only go up to size 11w. Sometimes they fit and sometimes I go home shoeless.
Glad to here your whole outfit works. The make-up gets easier with lots and lots of practice but it's definitly worth it.
Love,
Lisbeth

[DonnaT]

Good to hear you didn't let the snickering bother you too much, and you managed to purchase the heels you wanted. It will make you stronger for the next time.

I've purchased a few pairs at Payless, 3 pair on one visit because the SA was helpfull. I've purchased several pair at DSW as well, and had no trouble trying on before buying.

[Lisa(SO)]

Hi Robyn,

I too am glad that you were able to let the snickering be and buy your shoes . My husband has the attitude that he could care less as he wants those great shoes darn it and nobody will stop him!! He can always use the line " My wife is the same size foot and I want to make sure that these will work." I doubt anyone would beieve him but it can maybe give you a sense of security or more courage. Keep shoppng and it will get easier!!

[Virginia]

It is not initially easy to purchase things but as time goes on you begin to notice that most people could care less. Hell, you're dealing with someone who works in a shoe store for gods sake! Does the name Al Bundy ring a bell?? Trying on clothes is probably the ultimate challenge and/or "unmentionables." When I purchase a bra in a "nice" store, Macy's or VS, I always ask what their return policy is before I pay for it. They should never ask who it is for anyway.
In the shoe store, and this is just me as I know some of my sisters could not do it, but say the "clerk" asked "Are these for you?" I just lean forward look, look them in the eye and say, "YEAH! You got a problem with that?"
One other response would be "NO!, my _____________ (insert whoever, mother, father, aunt, uncle) just died, these are their funeral shoes. You know they use to wear a size seven, but an eight felt so good they would buy a nine (or whatever size you happen to be buying!)"
You know, I used to have the philosophy that the only person you ever had to impress was the one that signed your paycheck. Now I am even having second thoughts about that, but fearing a clerk in a shoe store or even a departemnt store, Uh NO! I don't think so!!!
When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping!
Shop on ladies!!
Virginia

[Angie]

Hi, Robyn!

Shoes were my first purchase, as well, and it did take a LOT of nerve. Congratulations, lady! As has been echoed on this thread, it does get much easier.

As for the makeup, purchasing it is not a really big problem, if you know what shades work best for you. You can always take the "trial and error" approach, like I did, and throw a different shade of foundation and powder in you cart the next time you need to make a run to WalMart. Mixed in with several other items, the cashier won't even give it a second thought. Of course, that approach does get to be a bit expensive. If you know about any CDer support groups (such as a local Tri Ess chapter), they might be able to direct you to a friendly cosmetics counter.

Sure, you'll get the snicker or odd look from time to time, but most salespersons are professional enough to realize that a sale is a sale, regardless of who is buying. I think you'll find that most will be quite willing to help or at least courteous.


Take Care
Angie

[Karren Hutton]

You did great, Robyn!!! I've never been in a payless shopping for fem shoes... My favorite shoe store is Value City.. Lots of shoes, good quality and great prices.. I try them on all the time no matter how I'm dressed.. And yeah, a guy in a male suit with high heels on gets a few looks and the odd manager flyby to see what I'm doing.. But who cares!! They never refused to sell them to me!! Lol

Bought a sweet pair of Liz Claborne knee high leather boots with 3 inch heels for under $30 there...

So get out there and buy what you want!!! Its a blast...

Love Karren

[Carla L]

I just bought some make up at Walmart and tried not to care too much about those who saw me. Several women had to go around me as I was looking. I was not comfortable but did it anyway. I'll keep plugging away.

[FrancineBrice]

Like Virginia said "It is not initially easy to purchase things but as time goes on you begin to notice that most people could care less".

My 1st time buying heels took a long time. I had my hose on under my pants so I could find the correct fit. I keep looking around and no one was paying me any interest. After I found a few selection I was trying them on and there were now several women customers in the area and other than a casual glance from time to time not a thing was said.
Francine

[Grace]

It does get easier the more often you buy things. I figure if they have a problem with it, it is really their problem, not mine. We're not doing anything illegal, and I don't do this where the people are likely to know me, so I don't worry about my reputation. I generally shop for shoes enfemme if I want to try them on, and have never had a problem.

Lately, I've gotten even bolder and have shopped en homme and told them up front it was for me. I find the younger sales assistants rarely have any problem with it, but I find a bit more nervousness out of the older ones. I think younger folks are more used to diversity. When I purchased some expensive lipstick recently en homme, I told her it was for me, and she looked at me and suggested some shades that would complement my skin. A very pleasant experience!

Basically, keep shopping and it gets easier and easier.

Grace

[Carla L]

I am so surprised!

I find the younger sales assistants rarely have any problem with it, but I find a bit more nervousness out of the older ones.

I really thought it better to ask an older woman, but come to think of it, I asked a younger sales lady about a dress at DressBarn, she was very helpful. It was the older lady at Payless shoes that chuckled.

I want to get some makeup and what I don't like about that is at Macy's, it is located at the front of the store with a lot of traffic. I want some foundation (I can't seem to get the right color) and some lipstick. I'm sure that will cost me a pretty penny, but my guessing the wrong colors is adding up...

[SilverLady(SO)]

Robyn -

Have you contacted your local Merle Norman store, to see if they are willing to do a makeover on a CD? Most will, or will at least direct you to a store that is more TG-friendly. Sometimes a Mary Kay or Avon representative will give you a makeover, and then it's in the privacy of your home.

Of course, they are all expecting you to buy some of their products, but you don't have to buy everything they use on you. Make a list of the products and colors used, and use that as a guide to buy some less-expensive items. If possible, obtain their color charts for comparison shopping.

- SL

[S. Lisa Smith]

Robyn -

Have you contacted your local Merle Norman store, to see if they are willing to do a makeover on a CD? Most will, or will at least direct you to a store that is more TG-friendly. Sometimes a Mary Kay or Avon representative will give you a makeover, and then it's in the privacy of your home.

Of course, they are all expecting you to buy some of their products, but you don't have to buy everything they use on you. Make a list of the products and colors used, and use that as a guide to buy some less-expensive items. If possible, obtain their color charts for comparison shopping.

- SL

+1 I've had great luck at MN and with Mary Kay ladies!

[DonnaT]

I've been in a couple of different Macy's stores here, with guys behind the counter, and they were wearing what they were selling.

At Hecht's they were doing demos at the entrance, and there was a guy proudly sitting there getting made-up.

These SAs apparently get a commission, and are helpful. I was picking up some powder for my wife, and talked to the SA about cover-up for myself. They are discrete. Getting the right shade should be easy.